What Men want

Why Men Lose Interest – 6 common Reasons

Posted on November 8, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

Why Men Lose Interest – 6 potential Reasons you need to know

Are you wondering in general why men lose interest at times, or, worse, are you actually reading this because you’ve just been ‘ghosted’? Ghosting is when the person you’re dating suddenly stops communicating – without any explanation – leaving you hurt and confused.

Let’s just say it’s an experience I wouldn’t wish to anyone, not even to my worst enemy.

You’re lucky if you’ve been offered some sort of explanation before your relationship ended, but that still doesn’t hurt any less.

Why do men act like they’re so in to you one minute, and then act like you don’t matter the next? It is so frustrating holding on to something that is very important to you and then lose it without any apparent reasons.

You didn’t have a big fight; in fact, you just had a great talk a few days ago, then he suddenly stopped calling. Why do men lose interest, and what makes him commit? The truth is … it’s not rocket science.

He’s not really interested to begin with
There was nothing to chase
There was no Time to build enough Attraction
You don’t have sexual Chemistry
Your attachment Style is incompatible
He met someone else

1. He’s not really interested to begin with

Maybe you have misread the signs, and all he wanted was a fleeting affair. Something you have mindlessly given him. Then he got bored, or thought you have served your purpose.

Now he wells it’s time for another rendezvous… but not with you. There are many fishes in the sea after all. If you’re dating a professional player, well, it’s kinda his style, so beware.

Also read: What to do when he pulls away

2. There was nothing to chase

Men love the chase; it’s something that amps them up. It excites them; it arouses them – until it’s time to put their game face on. That’s when they’ll really pursue you and try to win you.

If, however, you’re the one doing the chasing, then you’re taking out all the fun in the game.

Now the game feels too easy, and he’d be less interested in it. More so, because the prize isn’t that hard to get, if he still decides to dive into the relationship, expect it to fizzle out as fast as it started.

3. There was no Time to build enough Attraction

You’ve been constantly talking for the past few weeks. You have butterflies in your stomach. The world looks brighter and the future seems promising. Then, something happened; his pet goldfish died, he has to move to a new state, his parents got divorced – and now he has other priorities.

You can’t blame him nor should you blame yourself. Things like these happen all the time, and it’s disappointing. But who says you can’t meet each other again someday when you’re both ready?

4. You don’t have sexual Chemistry

The sex could be awkward or borderline funny, or he might have some fetishes he can’t share with you because he sensed you wouldn’t be up to it. These issues can generally be fixed if you are more open to each other, but if you’re just really incompatible in bed, then don’t force yourself to learn new tricks if it makes you uncomfortable.

There’s time for everything though, with an open mind and a little bit of research, you might be tempted to explore and understand your sexuality better. No need to wait for Christian Grey.

5. Your attachment Style is incompatible

Simply put, your relationship goals are not the same. You are ready for the hard parts and the bells and whistles of a serious, long-term relationship, but he’s only looking for a fling, or he’s so deeply scarred emotionally that he still can’t commit to a new, genuine relationship. His words not mine.

Either way, don’t bang your head against the wall (at least nor for too long). Who wants a scared-cat or a whiny teenage boy for a boyfriend? It’s his fault that he didn’t disclose to you what he really wanted in the first place, and you have all the right to be mad. But don’t let it destroy you. Chin up and put your big girl panties on.

6. He met someone else

There’s a better deal in the market and it’s time to bid you adieu. It could be the hardest to take, knowing you weren’t good enough. Sometimes it’s just what it is, and there’s nothing you can do about it. He could be simultaneously dating this other woman while he’s with you. Or he met someone he’s better matched with before your relationship even had the chance to be serious. The reason why men lose interest, isn’t always about you. That’s the lesson you should learn here.

Six Reasons why Men Lose Interest – Conclusion

You are not here to change a man’s upbringing and character, because you can’t. You don’t have to carry someone’s emotional baggage, either. When things don’t go as planned, think of it as a time to meet other people and practice becoming a better version of yourself.

Whether they can improve themselves to meet your standards is their problem, not yours.

Things To Do With Your Boyfriend – 25 Fun Activities

Posted on November 8, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

Things To Do With Your Boyfriend

Not sure what things to do with your boyfriend? Look no further! There are so many fun things to try with your favorite guy – if you have the time. If you are both busy, workaholic individuals, always try to assign at least one day a week or even a few hours to do simple activities together.

It is über-important to spend quality time with your boyfriend, so seize the day and don’t let a minute go to waste.

The curated list below is composed of fun and simple couple activities that won’t break the bank, so you can’t use the “no money” excuse.

1. Give him a Massage

This is one of the top things to do with your boyfriend. It can be so powerful to actually make a man fall in love with you as it will make him feel relaxed and rejuvenated.

2. Play Video Games

Make it more challenging – the loser will get to pay for dinner.

3. Movie Night or TV Show Marathon

Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, Stranger Things or the latest HBO flick – Westworld – be a couch potato together, this time without the guilt.

4. Couple Workout

Motivation is the hardest part of getting fit. Nothing can motivate you more effectively than knowing you get to spend the day with your man.

5. Scrap Booking

He probably won’t like it and that’s understandable. So, make it more fun and unconventional. Try digital scrap booking; include a lot of selfies and couple photos, à la Instagram. Add animations and videos if you’re into that.

6. Cook Dinner Together

Number six on our list of things to do with your boyfriend is real “food for the soul” because you both put time and effort into making it.

7. Have a fun Photo Shoot

Play dress-up like you’re going to attend a cosplay. You can ask a friend who’s into photography, or do it yourself using a tripod. Borrow some gear, or any digital camera will do.

8. Do Body Painting

It’s sensual, fun, artistic and exciting; he’ll definitely like it!

9. Read a book and discuss it

If he’s not a book reader then try comic books. Make a book club for two. Coffee or tea is a great accompaniment.

10. Home Makeover

It can be your house or his if you’re not living together. You’ll form a bond and will even get to save money that way.

11. Hike in the Wild

Of course follow safety precautions. Always give your destination to your trusted family or friends before leaving.

12. Star Gazing

It’s a good sideline activity for number 11 from this list. Stars are more visible away from city lights. But you can also use a home telescope and stay on the rooftop.

13. Get a free or cheap Tarot Reading

You’ll never know until you try. It can be fun and unusual, just keep an open mind. There are websites offering free online reading, make fun of the results. I know you will.

14. Watch a Sunrise or Sunset together

This never gets old. Aside from being romantic, you’ll appreciate the beauty of nature even more.

15. Snowball Fights

For a little adrenaline rush. If it’s not winter, then any ball game would do.

16. Watch a Game together

It’s good if you like watching sports. If you don’t like sports, a little sacrifice won’t hurt. Watch and cheer for his favorite team.

Watch this free presentation on making him go absolutely crazy for you just by the right choice of words!

17. Play the Best Food Hunt

Think of a meal or delicacy, say, cheesecake and then look for restaurants that offer cheesecake; agree on who serves the best version. Of course, it could take months before you reach a conclusion.

18. Take a Hot Bath Together

With candlelight, wine or champagne. It’s up to you what happens next.

19. Create a “Couple” Bucket List

List the things you want to do and places you want to visit together. Make a pact to follow through on the list.

20. Play a Sexy Game like Striptease Poker

Any card or board game will do. Wear your sexy lingerie.

21. Enroll in a Language Course

This will help if you’re doing number 19 from our list, and you plan on traveling to foreign countries. Learn Spanish and immerse yourself in the culture when you visit this country.

22. Volunteer

This is my favorite thing. You strengthen your relationship by helping other people.

23. Teach each other Something

There are probably skills you’re good at that you can share with your boyfriend. Like how to make a blog, how to prepare cool drinks, how to organize your home, and a lot more.

24. Make a Playlist for each other

Create a playlist of your favorite songs, include guilty pleasures. Ask him to do the same, then exchange playlist.

25. Watch YouTube Videos of funny Animals all Day

You can never stop at one video, believe me, I’ve tried.

How To Make A Guy Like You – Enchant Him Now!

Posted on November 8, 2016November 12, 2018 by HelpwithMen

How To Make A Guy Like You?!

It may sound silly, but how to make a guy like you is a fairly common question – most women have asked themselves this question at least once in their lives.

You meet this cute and interesting guy and there goes the million-dollar question, “How can I make this guy to like me?”

First, you need to be likeable, or at least noticeable. I’m not saying here that you need to be ultra-pretty with a supermodel body. Instead, confidence is the key!

And of course, don’t forget to look presentable, wear appropriate clothes
and practice good hygiene.

Why are these important? Because you can be plain Jane, but if you know how to take care good care of yourself and how to act with confidence at all times, you will eventually attract the right person.

Imagine if you looked like someone straight from a horror movie, the guy will definitely notice you, but in a negative way. Now, on to our life-saving tips on how to get a guy to like you:

Don’t act desperate
Learn the science behind attraction
Give him occasional compliments
Exude a positive and fun vibe
Get to know his interests
Engage in adrenaline-pumping activities
Final thoughts on how to make a guy like you

1. Don’t act Desperate

What guys need to sense from you is confidence and not desperation. So, anything blatantly, over-the-top, or begging for attention will definitely kill it.

You want to know how to be irresistible to a man? Ignore him – at least initially. If there’s a good opportunity for interaction, grab it, but be subtle about it. Don’t make it look like you’ve planned for it all your life.

Most guys would know if you’re interested; especially the alpha males. The good-looking, self-assured guys know they can make heads turn; don’t give them what they expect. In order to be irresistible to a man, you need to be different – because that’s what will make him curious about you. If you really can’t help checking him out, do so discreetly. Don’t stare at him from across the table!

Still don’t know how to be subtle? Check our second advice on how to make a guy like you.

2. Learn the Science behind Attraction

Believe it or not, even the scientific world is researching the secret behind attraction. Like many other scientists, a human sexuality professor at Syracuse University, Dr. Joe Fanelli believes there are scientific explanations as to why we are attracted to a certain person.

There are body language or love signals that convey our attraction to someone, and we can use these to our own advantage.

For example, batting your eyelashes is not just a trick to look cute. Science suggests that we blink faster when we are emotionally excited, which gives a signal that we are interested in someone. Also, a person leans towards someone who is important to them. Remember these body signals the next time you have the chance to talk to him.

3. Give him Occasional Compliments

Guys love it! I can’t stress this point enough. Every one of us needs a little pat on the back for a job well done. You don’t need to wait for an occasion to congratulate him for a win. You can simply compliment his looks or his interests without being creepy.

Try, “That hairstyle suits you. Have you had a haircut?” Or, “I didn’t know you’re good at drawing; I really admire artistic people!”

4. Exude a Positive and Fun Vibe

This is like making a statement that says, “This is what you will get if you’re with me.”

It’s true that some people are attracted to the complicated, the mentally unstable, or the “crazy” ones with a lot of emotional baggage.

But the majority of guys always look for the fun, easygoing type. Wondering how to get a guy to ask you out and then how to get a guy to like you? Talk about fun things or plan group activities together, just don’t overdo it.

Watch this free video presentation on how to become more attractive to men in no time!

5. Get to know His Interests

This gives him the impression that you are interested in knowing more about him, or that you’re interested in connecting with him more deeply and by doing so learning how to keep a man interested. It also shows that you are not self-absorbed and that you want to know and listen to other people rather than talk about yourself non-stop.

If you get a man to talk about his passions and the things that he loves, it will make him feel excited and it will lighten his mood. He will subconsciously associate that great feeling with you, making him want to talk to you again.

6. Engage in Adrenaline-Pumping Activities

Unless this is not his cup of tea, any activities that generate excitement can do the trick. It can be as simple as playing memory and brain games, paintball, bumper car riding or for the really adventurous – bungee jumping.

According to Dr. Fanelli, “Excitement generates a level of attractiveness.” Any experience that produces excitement can mimic the feeling of being aroused. Two people engaging in these activities may find each other attractive.

7. Final Thoughts on How to Make a Guy Like You

Take all the above tips on “how to make a guy like you” with a grain of salt. Ultimately, it’s still a case-to-case basis when it comes to attraction. If he still ends up not showing interest, don’t sweat it. You are unique and you have a lot to offer. The right person is probably somewhere reading articles like this too.

How to be irresistible to Men – make him hunt you!

Posted on October 21, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

Become the irresistible Woman that Men pursue

Overall, it is not very difficult for women to make guys appreciate and like them. And with the proper strategies applied, a woman can also easily learn how to be irresistible to men, in general.

The way to become irresistible to men is to improve yourself, in particular your personality. It is your personality that is the basic tool to rule over their minds.

You will need to accentuate each of your strong points while gradually reducing your weak points.

Please take note that it is definitely not true that only beautiful girls with the looks similar to celebrities can gain proper attention from guys.

Instead, the main key to being irresistible to men is to present yourself with confidence and with an open, positive attitude.

9 great Tips on how to be irresistible to Men

Have Confidence in your Femininity
Smile and laugh
Make Eye Contact
It’s okay to let them know you need them
Know how to accept Defeat gracefully
Show off your unique Personality
Be good to Others
Act sexy
Use Your Sense of Humor

1. Have Confidence in your Femininity

You’ve probably heard or read a lot of advice about having confidence in yourself as a way how to be attractive to the other gender. We’re going to take things a step farther by specifically giving you one of the aspects of your life to be confident about.

In this case, concentrate on being more feminine. Embrace the fact that you’re a woman. Cherish it. And most importantly of all, enjoy being a woman. You’re entitled to be feminine so go ahead and take advantage of that right.

2. Smile and laugh

Some girls do not know how or when to smile. It’s such a shame though since a smile is easily one of the best ways to get you to be irresistible to guys.

There are many different kinds of smiles you can use to attract guys. There’s the polite smile which works great if you’re feeling a little shy. There is also the come hither, the flirtatious smile if you’re feeling extra bold. There’s the “we-share-the-same-pain” smile which can also act as a great ice breaker.

As long as you keep smiling (genuinely, that is), you’ll have no problem reeling guys in. Also, laughter may be the best medicine, but it is also a great technique to attract men. Nowadays, guys are more comfortable with girls who have a sense of humor. They are easily attracted to women who know just how to have fun with their friends.

And if you want to make him smile in turn – a great way to make him feel really attracted to you as he will perceive you as a happy and positive person, check out these ideas on some texts to make him smile. Sometimes, all it takes to make him smile is a short text message to him! And there are always endless things to talk about with a guy (or send him a text about), that would get him excited about you.

3. Make Eye Contact

Another great way on how to be irresistible to men is making eye contact. Sometimes stronger than a spoken word, eye contact has the power to convey all sorts of messages.

In this way, it is quite similar to the smile. Making eye contact with a guy lets him know that you have noticed him and that you’re interested in him. Holding your gaze and curving your lips into a smile is practically an open invitation for a proper introduction. Such confidence is alluring to men, and they won’t be able to keep themselves from approaching you after that.

4. It’s okay to let them know you need them

Becoming irresistible to men also has a lot to do with learning how to understand a man. If you want to become irresistible to the man of your choice, try lowering your pride a bit and let him know when you need him.

This does not mean you have to be all needy and clingy. That’s taking things too far. Simply put, you just have to act naturally and let a guy know when you’d appreciate his manly help. You shouldn’t deny the fact that you’re a woman and as such, there are things that men can do more easily than a woman might be able to.

Also Read: How Guys fall in Love with You

5. Know how to accept Defeat gracefully

Keep in mind that even though you might be able to learn all the tips and tricks in the world in order to master how to be irresistible to men, that does not automatically mean you’ll be the ideal woman for every guy.

There will always be instances where a man may still turn you down. Make sure you understand you’re not always being turned down because you may not be attractive in the eyes of the man in question. It could simply be because the guy’s already committed to, or in love with someone else, or for any other reason outside your realm of influence.

6. Show off your unique Personality

Often, men are attracted to a woman because she might look like his mother or because they are similar to his ex-girlfriend.

However, understand that men find women with unique personalities absolutely irresistible. Therefore, if you want to put a special mark in his mind and heart, you have to show off your unique personality. Think of your best characteristics that other women don’t have and use it to attract men.

7. Be good to Others

Show him how kind and nice you are to other people. Men will ignore and even completely forget about women who nag, insult and make fun of others.

Because men are drawn to women who they believe of they will never hurt them and who they believe of that they know how to take care of them. Men, therefore are strongly drawn to women who are genuinely nice to others. You do not have to be an angel to do this, but you need to learn how to respect others no matter what they’re color and race is.

8. Act sexy

Do you know how to flirt? If you want men to like and love you like crazy, you need to know the art of flirting. Flirting can be simply defined as acting sexy – talking, walking, and smiling sexily.

However, be very careful with putting this to work. Men might think that you are looking for somebody who will either invite you to his place or somebody you can invite to your place. Always know your own limits and never come across as trying too hard.

9. Use Your Sense of Humor

Showing a good sense of humor can be one of the biggest turn ons for guys. Men want somebody who will listen to them and somebody who will share jokes with them. If you have a great sense of humor, you no longer need to think about how to be irresistible to men, you already possess a great character trait that you can use to your advantage.

Further Reading: How to tell if a Guy likes You

How to make a Guy miss you – 10 surefire Ways

Posted on October 21, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

Tips on how to make a guy miss you – 10 Ways to make him long for you

Do you want to know how to make a guy miss you more when the two of you are not together? It may be just a petty fight between the two of you, or it may be as serious as a breakup. Or he may be taking you for granted, and you’re sick of it.

No matter what the reason is, a guy will miss you if he’s given a chance.

There are more than enough ways to make yourself irresistible to your man, but here are 10 surefire ways on how to make a guy miss you:

Don’t give him a Call or connect with him
Give him and yourself some Space
Leave Something of yours behind
Have a lot of Self-control
Be out of his Sight for Weeks
Call and say good Night
Show emotional Stability
Have a Hobby
Control yourself
Do not be a ‘Yes’ Woman

1. Don’t give him a Call or connect with him

You need him to feel your absence and if you call him or connect with him in any way that purpose is defeated. Even if you want to tell him that he means nothing to you or that he’s going to regret his decision, don’t. Don’t involve emotions and it will have the right impact.

2. Give him and yourself some Space

Do not be around each other too much. If he gets to see you every single hour of every single day, then nothing in this article about how to make a guy miss you more will help you. Be there when your man needs you, but don’t be too clingy.

3. Leave Something of yours behind

Leave something of yours strategically behind. It’s one of the best ways to serve as a reminder of you.

Be naughty or nice, the choice is yours…a single earring form a pair, a set of keys, the book you have been reading or lingerie…all serve as warm reminders that make a man miss you and make him look forward to meeting you again.

4. Have a lot of Self-control

The moment you have decided to stop being needy, you should also have to make sure you gain a lot of self-control. This is the only way that you won’t lose focus of you goal – which is to make him miss you.

If you are having a hard time stopping yourself from clinging to your man, then share your goal (to have self-control) with some of your friends. These people will serve as your anchor each time you’re itching to contact your man.

5. Be out of his Sight for Weeks

One thing you can do is to not show yourself to him. Make him wonder where you are after a few days of not seeing you. It wouldn’t come as a surprise that he’d be calling you just to make sure you’re alright.

And the next time he sees you, he might just jump with joy and give you an I-miss-you-so-much hug.

6. Call and say good Night

You wonder how to make a guy fall in love with you? At the end of the day give him a call and simply say “good night”. People are loneliest at night, and this gesture of yours will warm his heart and make him want to be with you even more.

7. Show emotional Stability

There are many things that can drive your man away. Being too emotional or childish are two of them. Men need to be around people who are fun and emotionally stimulating in a positive way. This is why he goes out and hangs with his friends as soon as the two of you fight.

8. Have a Hobby

Give yourself time to engage in fun activities and the things you love doing. If you want your man to miss you, make him see that you’re doing well enough when he’s not around.

9. Control yourself

It is normal for a lady to be expressive, particularly with regards to her feelings for the person she loves. Let him know that you cherish him and that you miss him, but don’t go saying it every time you get the chance.

When he feels that you’re holding back, he will make an effort to spend some quality time with you.

10. Do not be a ‘Yes’ Woman

Every once in a while, say ‘no’ to your guy. Has he invited you for a last-minute date? Don’t go. Is he calling you after a long while of ignoring you? Don’t pick up. Do not be his doormat. Play hard to get, and he will try, try and try to get you.

Further Reading: How to make a Guy like You

Getting over your Ex – move on with a happy, healthy Life!

Posted on October 20, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

Getting over Your Ex – and get your Life back!

If you have been fortunate enough to live past your early 20s, then you know that getting over your ex is one of the biggest dilemmas of adulthood. It can be heart-wrenching painful, difficult and, more often than not, it will feel like daring the impossible.

We’ve all been there, and if it is the first time you are trying to forget an ex-husband or ex-boyfriend, then welcome to the other side of love and relationships.

Where it has to get a little worse before it finally gets better.

That being said, we are all about giving great relationship advice for women. So here are some great tips that will help you piece your heart together. Read on and learn to move on with your life and, equally important, help you learn to love again in the future.

Accept that it never worked and that It isn’t entirely your Fault
It okay to mourn your lost Love, but don’t wallow in your pitiful State forever
Go out, let your Hair down and have some Fun
Minimize all Contact
Pamper Yourself
Hit the Gym

1. Accept that it never worked and that It isn’t entirely your Fault

A majority of us will first try very hard to rationalize why men pull away to begin with, and then go on to blame ourselves for a failed relationship sometimes even for as long as several years after it is long over.

Fine, both of you might have had something to do with the broken union, but as the saying goes; it takes two to tango. You were both responsible for the breakup and you shouldn’t go on feeling as if you solely caused the split. At the same time, accept your loss with grace and maturity.

It is only after you have completely come to terms with your heartbreak that you will be ready to rebuild your life again.

2. It okay to mourn your lost Love, but don’t wallow in your pitiful State forever

Girls, it’s perfectly okay to have an ‘emotional flu‘, and such ’emotional flu’ is actually quite important in getting over your ex. This is the time and phase after a breakup that you give yourself some time to get it all out of your system.

So lock yourself in for one or two days, scream, sob, listen to slow, melancholic music with an infinite repeat until you feel like it’s all out. It is only after this that you will start to heal and mend those broken pieces.

3. Go out, let your Hair down and have some Fun

Note, this doesn’t in any way imply reckless partying, drinking yourself silly and ending up in a stranger’s bed. While it is important to allow yourself time to grief by loosening up a bit, you will still need to have your limits in check. Otherwise, you end up even more hurt than you were before.

Alternatively, you can skip the nightclubs and go for a short, relaxing vacation to unwind, refocus and ‘find yourself again.’ We can all agree that relationships have a way of sucking up your energy, spirit, and soul. Getting out of town for a week or two can help you come back to old self by reprogramming back your body and mind to its default, ‘pre-breakup’ setting.

4. Minimize all Contact

Out of sight, out of mind. It is as simple as that. If it helps, unfriend / unfollow him on your social media profile and delete all past ‘cute messages’. Find a way of getting rid of his stuff and cut off all unnecessary physical links with them.

And depending on how acrimonious the break-up was, sometimes it may be necessary to delete their contacts and cut them off completely from your life. But that’s a little bit on the extreme side. Minimizing day-to-day contact should be just enough.

5. Pamper Yourself

As women, we tend to forget how special we are when we are in a relationship. It’s not surprising that most women will go out of their way to make a relationship last – sometimes even when love has already flown out of the window. It’s our protective, motherly instincts coming into play and there is nothing wrong with that.

However, you have to re-discover yourself if at all there is any chance for you moving on. So now, instead of expecting him to do all the nice things for you, it is probably time you did them for yourself. So take yourself out for a cute coffee or quick dinner date to that fancy restaurant out of town. Sooner rather than later, you will start feeling your self-worth soar high again.

6. Hit the Gym

Yes, get that dream body back. You might have been hurt, but this doesn’t mean that you should stay sad and indoors forever. Go out there, sweat it out and feel a surge of confidence pumping through veins!

In other words, there is life even after a nasty break up. Follow above steps for getting over your ex boyfriend, and move on.

Why Do Men Cheat and Lie … and who’s to blame?

Posted on October 20, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

Why do Men Cheat and Lie? And why it is usually not YOUR Fault!

Why do men cheat and lie all the time? “I don’t generally have trust issues; I just can’t be with someone who lies all the time.” I once told a friend as he tried to bombard me insinuating questions about women and trust issues.

When a woman gets jealous or turns suspicious, people automatically view her as being insecure, or as my friend put it – having trust issues.

I hate that the blame is just passed on to women, without realizing what causes them to feel that way.

Instead of attacking the revolting behavior of cheating and lying, women are often told that it is somehow their fault.

An older woman in her 60s, who was very close to me – kicked his husband of 30 years out of their home – after finding out he was cheating. Her husband, a quiet, all-around nice guy, who served as a public officer in the area was loved by many.

You would expect her friends and relatives to come and comfort her, but I was there when she was jabbed with questions by people who think they know better.

Are you sure he’s cheating on you? Do you have proof? Maybe it’s because you got busy with the kids and you don’t make yourself desirable anymore? Perhaps you two are not having enough sex? We’re still wrapped up in victim-blaming that victims of infidelities choose to hide their ordeal the world.

But guess what? It’s NOT your fault.

Interesting Insight on who it is that Men cheat with on their Woman

A dating site for married people, Victoria Milan, (Yes, Ashley Madison is not the only one), polled 4,000 participants and revealed some interesting insights:
•   Most male respondents admitted their significant others are more attractive than their mistresses
•   Only 30% of men chose to cheat on younger women
•   Only a quarter of male respondents think their mistresses have better bodies than their partners

Why do Men cheat and lie?!

There are myriad of reasons why a man would stray, and it depends on who you’d ask. I’d say it’s because they’re pigs, but that’s just putting it mildly, and besides, it’s unfair to the pigs.

I’m not saying you’re off the hook; you could still be one of the reasons, but focusing on what you lack or what you did wrong would not be helpful, for it is more likely a combination of different reasons.

So, I compiled here the common reasons that provide answers as to why do men cheat and lie, according to experts. Some of the psychological reasons would surprise you; the rest doesn’t take a genius to know.

He is confused about Love
He is covering deeply-rooted Insecurities
“My Partner does not meet my Needs in the Relationship”
He is narcissistic
Your Man thinks of Infidelity as a Way out
He had suffered Trauma and Abuse before
The Routine bores him

1. He is confused about Love

Your partner may have confused the giddy feeling of infatuation with love, thus, he must’ve rushed into a relationship – not knowing that it takes hard work and commitment to maintain a stable and loving relationship.

2. He is covering deeply-rooted Insecurities

A person with low self-esteem is most likely to compromise his integrity. When you don’t understand your true worth, you need to seek validation from other people that you’re still attractive.

When a man is aware of his worth, he will leave an unhappy relationship before it damages his character.

3. “My Partner does not meet my Needs in the Relationship”

Sometimes a man may have unrealistic expectations that all his needs will and should be met by his partner. When the other person ‘fails him’ in meeting these expectations, he then thinks he is entitled to look for intimate connection elsewhere.

4. He is narcissistic

A narcissist, whether he is a man or woman, will cheat on you no matter how good your sex life is. A narcissists feels superior and entitled to more than most people; he also resents all limitations that are placed upon him.

5. Your Man thinks of Infidelity as a Way out

He wants to get out of the relationship, but can’t tell you directly. He hopes his extramarital affairs will serve as the message he has no balls to give you.

6. He had suffered Trauma and Abuse before

Men with psychological and emotional pain from past experiences may need to seek medical help. Physical and social abuse, especially in his formative years, can affect how he acts and commits with other people.

7. The Routine bores him

If men themselves are being asked why do men cheat and lie, this is one of the most common excuses they present. But instead of communicating to their partners what they want from the relationship or making the initiative of reigniting the desire between them, they often choose to start anew with another woman.

Don’t let the Betrayal define you

The trauma caused by infidelity can be hard to overcome. It’s a big blow to be betrayed by the man you love. It affects your self-esteem, and may give you irrational fears of future encounters with other men.

It’s important to know that someone’s deceit and betrayal doesn’t define you, and you shouldn’t let it dictate how you live your life. Work on accepting above points and it will be a lot easier for you to work on how to save your relationship and marriage.

Further Reading: The main Reasons why Men pull away

How to forget Someone you love – so you can move on!

Posted on October 13, 2016November 11, 2018 by HelpwithMen

How to forget Someone you love – for a happier, healthier Future ahead of you!

Can you actually learn how to forget someone you love? Does it feel like you will be haunted by thoughts of your ex for the rest of your life? You wonder just how to survive a breakup? Is there anything you can do to put things in perspective?

Getting over a break-up is always difficult, but when you still love your ex, it can feel almost unbearable.

Everyone tells you, “It will get better with time,” but that day seems far away.

However, if you’re looking for some pointers to help you get through the next few weeks and months, consider the following suggestions.

You may not completely forget someone you love, but you will be in a way better position to move on without him.

The following are our best Advises on how to forget someone you love:

Admit It Is Over
Work out your Grief
Don’t live with constant Reminders
Fill your Life with new Activities and Interests
Talk with Your Friends
Reduce Contact
Forgive
Remember who You are
Have Fun, and start Dating

1. Admit It is over

Before you can move on, you’ve got to admit to yourself that the relationship you thought would never end is, indeed, over. Cry on friends’ shoulders, write sad poems and listen to all the great break-up songs you can find in your music collection.

Before you do this, though, get your calendar. Mark the date three days from now as the date when you will stop your official mourning period and move on. Circle it in red, put a shiny foil star on it, do something. If you use your phone’s calendar, fill that day with alarms that will remind you that it’s time to move on.

2. Work out your Grief

In order to banish the ghost of a past relationship, you must complete the process of saying good-bye. Much as when someone dies, you need to go through the ritual of grief before you will be able to completely let go.

So give yourself some time to mourn the loss. Talk it out with friends; write it down in your journal; punch your pillow if that helps. Get professional assistance if you believe this may help you. Allow yourself a few moments each day to do your “grief work” – then focus on your present and your future. To forget someone you love, you have to ‘exorcise your pain’.

3. Don’t live with constant Reminders

It’s hard to forget a guy when you’re surrounded by constant reminders of his former presence in your life. If you shared a house or apartment together, maybe now is a good time to move.

Don’t go to your favorite restaurant and your favorite bar all the time – too many ghosts. Take his photos down. And must you still root for his alma mater’s football team? You’ll never be able to forget someone you love if you surround yourself with the mementos of a past relationship.

4. Fill your Life with new Activities and Interests

To replace the old memories and associations, you need to create new ones. You’ll benefit from the distraction, and you’ll start to fill up your time with activities and interests that aren’t so heavily associated with the man you lost.

It may be a good time to take up that new hobby you didn’t have time for before. Or take that vacation you had been planning for months – but make it a girlfriends’ trip. Whether it’s trying a new exercise class or going back to school, there are many constructive activities in which you can become involved. If you’re ever going to forget someone you love, you must fill the empty spaces.

5. Talk with Your Friends

Your friends are there for a reason, and they want to help you get through this period. Have them come over and share your feelings and lean on them when you feel like you might not be able to go on.

6. Reduce Contact

Even if you still want to be friends with your ex, it is best to reduce contact with him immediately after you have broken up. This is because your wounds are still very fresh and they need some time to heal.

7. Forgive

One of the hardest things to do at the end of a relationship is to forgive the other person. However, if you want to understand how to forget someone you love and to ultimately move on with your life, then it must be done.

When you can forgive them for what they have done, you will feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders and it will allow you to move on.

8. Remember who You are

Quite often, when people become heavily involved in relationships, they forget themselves. They stop doing the things they once enjoyed, and they put their relationship first.

Now is the time to get back to what you loved! Play that musical instrument you put away a few years ago. Pick up those paintbrushes, and spend an afternoon immersing your soul in art. Get out your writing supplies, and start working on the next great American novel. Whatever it is, the point is, you have to do what pleases you deep inside. Be yourself, and love yourself.

9. Have Fun, and start Dating

We have arrived at our last step in learning how to forget someone you love. Have fun, and start dating again! Once you are feeling a little more like yourself, get out of the house. Go on little trips with your friends, and try to meet new people. This is a crucial part of the process it takes to forget someone you love – you must step outside your boundaries, realize that your opportunities for friendship and fun are limitless and that you do indeed have a chance to make a new life for yourself.

Start dating, even if it is just with your friends! Go out in groups, act silly, meet people to talk to, and soon enough you will wonder what it was you were so concerned about.

Life is great … take it in!

Also read: The Reasons why Men pull away

Love pdf and Dating pdf – The best Dating Books

Posted on October 13, 2016June 24, 2022 by HelpwithMen

Love pdf / Dating pdf – Get your Copy of a great Relationship eBook … free of Charge!

Love pdf and dating pdf eBooks are nowadays in high demand when it comes to getting good relationship advice for women. Most of them are very affordable while others are even completely free of charge. Right here on this page we offer three, fantastic quality dating .pdfs for free and instant download!

Each .pdf eBook will help you a great deal in improving your relationship, or your marriage, or even to find a great guy to begin with.

Simply provide your first name and email address on one of the download forms on this site, and we will immediately send you a link to download the relationship eBook of your choice, free of charge!

After having downloaded your free copy of the dating and relationship eBook of your choice, go ahead and check out the following dating books we selected.

“The Art of Approaching” by Thunder Cat
“Become A Man Who Naturally attracts Women” by Dan Bacon
“How To Be A Lady Killer” by Ann May
“Make Women Laugh” by Martin Merrill
“Passion Keys” – by Steve Ubah

They may not come for free but they all do provide great advice on several aspects of relationships or the dating game.

Also, they may not be all tailored specifically towards women, but more often than not, women can learn tons of new stuff on relationship issues from books that are actually written for men.

1. “The Art of Approaching” by Thunder Cat

Ever had problems with approaching a woman? Don’t worry because you’re not the only man who might not have enough courage to actually approach a woman. Don’t be ashamed of it. This book will greatly help you in conversing with women.

It’s a motivational book that gives you so many ideas on approaching women. As you finish reading this book, you’re guaranteed to succeed. When you go out tonight you will not have any issues getting phone numbers from all kinds of different women!

2. “Become A Man Who Naturally attracts Women” by Dan Bacon

The psychology of attraction can be a mystery. Yet, the way to attract a woman can be possible also for you. You don’t need to be some filthy rich man to do that.

Here’s a highly instructional book that can change your mindset as well as your behavior. If you have a problem with your body language, don’t worry because this book contains all the tips on effectively communicating with a woman using body language.

3. “How To Be A Lady Killer” by Ann May

This book is written by a dating expert, and quite surprisingly, she’s a beauty salon owner as well. What made Ann May decide to write this book is that during her years in the beauty salon business, she listened to thousands of women sharing their thoughts on dating.

She then realized that, no matter how different every woman is, they still want the same thing from a relationship. In this book, you’ll know the steps to meeting someone and being able to date her. There are also key points on effective seduction!

4. “Make Women Laugh” by Martin Merrill

Judging by its title you maybe won’t feel enticed to buy this book. But don’t judge the book by its title, it is definitely a ‘love pdf’ eBook worth a read!

Martin Merrill has written this book for men who are unsuccessful in approaching women. He has taken some conventional ways and looked at the issue from a different angle. It’s like you are defying gravity with the tips he has given you.

What’s more is that the book will teach you to quickly attract women with the help of humor. Laughter can break the monotony you have during your date. Put into actions the tips in the book and you will definitely be able to attract women.

5. “Passion Keys” – by Steve Ubah

“Caressing his ego” is on its face a somewhat laughable aspect of “Passion Keys”. Yet, in reality is a serious concept that should be addressed in many relationships. Terms like “bread winner,” “man of the house” and “wearing the pants in the relationship” might seem to be sexist but are used to re-assert the male domination in a relationship.

Unfortunately, we often perceive relationships more like a “race”, with the institution of marriage at the end of the finish line. We grow complacent, and although we may think that all is well, women are crying out for attention. We inadvertently push them away. The concept of “Caressing a male ego” as explained by Steve Ubah in “Passion Keys” helps men to stay vibrant and active, keeping their relationships fun and spontaneous.

6. “Double Your Dating” by David DeAngelo

If you read the first edition of this wonderful eBook, you probably experienced first hand how much change it has brought into your life and how much skill you have developed in approaching women and getting them to do what you would love.

But the second, updated edition is even more of a bomb. It is a thriller and a pack of seduction tools bundled into a book. The author has added more tips and also elaborates on earlier tips he had given in its first edition. Both will help you have your way with women in the most rewarding and mutually satisfying relationships.

This love pdf book is a rave. Numerous people who have read it cannot resist to share their experiences with others in blogs and even in personal emails to the author. The book as enjoyed an incredible amount of attention and publicity within a very short time of its publication.

Love pdf – Conclusion on Dating eBooks

Dating books do not present any tested or tried formulas, which will work for anyone, including yourself. Instead, they ask you to present your true self.

Hiding or camouflaging one’s true dreams and desires is a waste of efforts to a relationship by two people. Transparency, honesty, and right self-projection are the basis of the best and healthiest relationships. The chemistry will automatically follow.

Remember that it is not the relationship that makes individuals, but rather it is the individuals who make a relationship. So be truthful and you will find the perfect partner for yourself. Good luck!

Also read: The best Relationship Books

Best Relationship Books – My TOP 5 Picks

Posted on October 12, 2016November 2, 2018 by HelpwithMen

My TOP 5 Picks for the best Relationship Books Money can buy

To make love and relationships work, a couple needs to take the prerogative to learn tips and techniques that can bring them closer and make their relationships stronger. Our pick of 5 of the hottest and best relationship books out there, can help.

There are many sources of information available that can help lovers build and strengthen their relationships and marriages. The market seems to be flooded with books from different authors.

And many of these books about relationships are packed with information on how to reinvigorate and reignite the passion in a relationship.

Here are 5 of our top picks in the category “Best Relationship Books”. Note that they are all somewhat distinct as far as their content. Already from their book titles you will see if any one of those might be of interest to your specific relationship situation or problem. You should also check out this article here, if you are particular interested in free love pdf books.

“The Five Languages of Love (The Secret to Love that Lasts)”
“Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work”
“Deal Breakers: When to Work On a Relationship and When to Walk Away”
“Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship”
“47 Little Love Boosters For a Happy Marriage: Connect and Instantly Deepen Your Bond No Matter How Busy You Are”

1. “The Five Languages of Love (The Secret to Love that Lasts)” – by Dr. Gary Chapman

This incredibly helpful book is written by the globally renowned, highly acclaimed Dr. Gary Chapman. The book looks at one of the most important issues that modern relationships face, namely that different people speak different languages of love.

So what does ‘languages of love’ mean in the context of the book? Language of love here means that different people find different ways to emotionally express romantic love and affection.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman the five languages of love are:

Spending quality time with your partner
Receiving gifts
Physical touch to show affection
Words of affirmation
Acts of service

The author cleverly demonstrates that different people have a different response to all these acts of love. For example, while receiving gifts may be an act of love to one person, it might not be to another person.

Every person has unique needs when it come to love. Therefore, for a relationship to be successful, you first of need to know which language of love your partner responds to. You then need to make sure you consistently show them love in a language they emotionally agree with.

In his book, Dr. Chapman gives plenty of illustrations from his own practice. Additionally, this informative and well written book also contains questions, questionnaires and answers that will help you determine whether you know which language of love your partner responds to.

2. “Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work” – by Matthew McKay, PhD and Patrick Fanning

This book will help couples understand how to resolve any problems they encounter in their relationship. The book made our ‘best relationship books’ hit – list as it is an excellent help in keeping yourself informed about any potential or actual issues in your relationship, and how to do them right.

Patrick Fanning and Mathew McKay help getting you to acquire skills that will come in handy in improving communication, resolving relationship conflicts in a healthily way and coping with problems that relationships deal with on a daily basis. The book illustrates very nicely how couples can manage to communicate honestly and openly.

Additionally, this book focuses on a little known but highly effective technique that can strengthen a relationship, the so called ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). This technique helps couples accept and deal with their personal emotions and feelings to alter what may influence their relationships. After reading this book, a couple will be able to decide what is important to them. They will also be able to take steps to ensure their relationship meets the needs of each partner, equally.

Apart from being an easy read, this book also provides useful and unique techniques. A couple can easily implement these in their daily relationship – lives. If you are in the market for a fun and enjoyable book that will strengthen your relationship, then “Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work” by Matthew McKay, PhD and Patrick Fanning is a great choice.

Also Read: How to make a Guy miss You

3. “Deal Breakers: When to Work On a Relationship and When to Walk Away” – by Dr. Bethany Marshall

Definitely one of the best relationship books for women who have a history of bad relationships. The book specifically tackles and discusses unhealthy men. This books helps a woman examine the relationships she has had in the past. It helps to examine the people they choose to date and to discover any repeated patterns.

The book will make a woman ask herself why she may have been in countless relationships that have not worked. If you are looking for a book that will help you understand why you have consistently dated men who ended up hurting you then this is a great choice.

After this book you will be able to determine what your deal breakers are. This will help you set a new standard to avoid getting into unhealthy relationships that will hurt and disappoint you in the end. You will be able to decide whether the man you are currently dating is worth fighting for.

4. “Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship” – by Mira Kirshenbaum

This book is essentially a detailed guide that will help you know when it is time to leave a relationship. It contains self analysis techniques that will help ascertain whether you are in a healthy relationship or in a situation that is only dragging you down and wasting your precious time and effort.

The book is specifically tailored to help the reader get to the roots of the problems in their relationships. That way you can come to a sensible and reasonable conclusion regarding any issues. The self analysis techniques in this highly informative book will help you look at your relationship objectively and practically. You will be able to decide to either stay and fight for your relationship, or to move on. The book emphasizes on putting your best interest first and only compromising when it is within reason.

5. “47 Little Love Boosters For a Happy Marriage: Connect and Instantly Deepen Your Bond No Matter How Busy You Are” – by Marko Petkovic

Our last pick in the “best relationship books” series addresses relationships both in the ‘golden days’ and also in today’s modern days. It is a great book for couples who are struggling to keep the romance and passion alive.

The book uses testimonials from happy couples to give you tips on how to keep a relationship alive. According to this book, it only takes a few minutes a day to show love, affection and concern to the person you love. It is all about taking the prerogative to make your partner feel loved and appreciated.

And there is more! The book actually comes with an audio book that you and your partner can listen to together. That way, you can collaboratively make your relationship stronger and more affectionate.

With the help of this little guide, a couple can effectively strengthen their marriage or relationship. You will be able to reignite the passion and romance that fades when partners stop trying. Happy reading!

Recommended Reading: The best Love .pdf Books