Easy Ways How to be a better Girlfriend (psychologically proven)
Do you wonder sometimes how to be a better girlfriend to him? A woman who values her romantic relationship knows that it is dynamic. Our relationships change continuously, whether we like it or not.
Change also comes from within and constant improvement is the key in keeping the love alive. You may be dating a man who does not openly say what he wants from the relationship – well, most men would not even tell you, even if you ask.
You are probably here because you care about your partner, so much so that you aspire to become a better girlfriend. Yet, your partner’s idea of what a great girlfriend is can be different from what you think.
I’m sure you’re already a fantastic girlfriend, but do you see room for improvements?
I believe we can all do a little better at times, and, as we know, being a girlfriend isn’t always easy, and takes work.
We’re no mind-readers, but there are certain things we can do to be an even better girlfriend.
This doesn’t mean that we have to change ourselves, or turn our own life upside down, but it requires patience, understanding, and attention to detail.
Then, with the following tips, he’ll appreciate and love you even more than before and you’re well on your way to tremendously improving your relationship.
Learn how to handle Conflicts better
Be a better Girlfriend by Respecting his Space
More Support, less Criticism
Be kind to each other
Help Him where it’s needed
Treat His Family and Friends with Respect
Surprise Him on Occasion
Dress stunningly for Your weekly Date-Night
Be the best Girlfriend by letting Him take charge during Sex
Stroke His Ego
Trust Him unconditionally
A simple “I love You”
How to be the best Girlfriend in a long-term Relationship
1. Stay independent
You wonder how to be the perfect girlfriend to him? Then learn to understand that independence is important not only for you as a woman, but also to your relationship with your man. Independence is attractive, whether you’re a man or a woman.
Independence also teaches how to build trust in a relationship. An independent woman can function on her own, doesn’t focus all her attention and energy to one man, and has a host of interests and commitments that keeps her busy.
She can be happy in and out of a romantic relationship. Independent girlfriends are not clingy because they are self-reliant; they don’t depend on their boyfriends to make them happy.
One of the biggest mistakes people in a relationship make is seeking another person to complete them, and often end up blaming that person for their unhappiness.
It’s easy: Remind yourself of the independent person you are. Have your own hobbies, (girl-)friends and interest. You will be much more interesting to him that way!
Recommended Reading: The best ways to how to keep a man interested in you
2. Learn how to handle Conflicts better
People in stressful relationships handle conflicts poorly.
According to marriage expert, Susan Heitler, Ph.D, couples who work together in solving their problems constructively have stronger relationships, and it even cuts their risk for stress-related diseases.
Ironing out daily issues can easily turn into a battle of who’s right and who’s wrong.
A great girlfriend knows that it’s more important to resolve the issue at hand, and to come up with a solution that works for both parties.
Your guy would appreciate how mature you are in handling your relationship problems. In return, he will be inclined to reciprocate by coming up with solutions himself.
Therefore, if you truly want to understand how to keep a man happy, start by avoiding the following behavior during conflicts:
- leaving passive-aggressive notes
- giving him the silent treatment or cold shoulder
- name calling
- blaming the other person
- yelling or cussing
It’s easy: Learn to chose your battles! Not every little thing that’s annoying to you is worthwhile arguing over, or even mentioning it. Learn to let things go a little. Sport and even breathing exercises can help with that.
3. Be a better Girlfriend by Respecting his Space
When a woman hears the word “space” in the relationship, she often thinks it’s a sign that the relationship is going off-track. In reality, maintaining your own personal space is a sign of a healthy relationship.
Because men thrive in an environment where they can spend fun times with their peers and share ideas with them, while women prefer a constant connection with their significant other – conflicts often arise.
You may feel neglected if your man asks for a Netflix binge with friends where you are not included. However, an important part of understanding how to be the best girlfriend is to learn that maintaining attachments with other people is also important to your well-being.
So, let the boys have their man cave for themselves. After all, you still need to announce your latest matte lipstick obsession with your girl squad.
How to be the perfect Girlfriend … the easy Way!
4. Stop snooping
The science of perception has long concluded that we often see what we actively seek. If you are the kind of girlfriend who routinely sneaks in to check your boyfriend’s phone – looking for ‘sexts’ and unusual phone calls – you are more likely to misjudge your guy’s behavior more than seeing it for what it actually is.
Snooping is also a breach of someone’s right to privacy.
If your man is doing something that is bothering you, open up and tell him what’s on your mind, instead of trying to guess the password to his Facebook account or reading his phone messages without his permission.
It’s easy: Just don’t do it! When tempted, remind yourself that it may simply be your mind playing tricks with you and also remind yourself of the possible negative effects it can have. Simply refrain from snooping!
5. More Support, less Criticism
You wonder how to be the perfect girlfriend? To truly be a better girlfriend, give him more support and less criticism!
Sometimes you might tend to forget that your boyfriend has his own mother, and as such does not need another mouth to bombard him with unsolicited advice.
Sure, you only want what’s best for him, but you have to make sure that you don’t sound like you’re criticizing his every move.
Criticism is toxic to a relationship; ask yourself if you want to be around someone who always magnifies your flaws.
Any man hates the feeling of being devalued, according to Steven Stosny, Ph.D., author of One Thing that Will Ruin a Perfectly Good Relationship.
There are many ways to show concern without being too critical. Genuine concern over your boyfriend’s behavior focuses on improvement and not on belittling his personality.
It is not coercive or controlling. If you find yourself punishing or withdrawing affection when your boyfriend fails to do what you want, you are being critical.
It’s easy: Remember that criticism can be highly toxic to a relationship. The benefits of constantly criticizing your boyfriend will definitely be out-weight by this toxicity. Do not criticize him, unless absolutely necessary.
Click here to watch this free Video on how to be Become a better Girlfriend to him!
6. Be kind to each other
Psychologists John and Julie Gottman have studied thousands of couples to determine the ingredients to a successful relationship.
The study, spanning over four decades, found that couples in happy and long-lasting relationships are kind and generous to each other.
How you treat your partner is a great predictor of how strong your relationship will be.
Being kind is more than just being nice. It is knowing when to give support and encouragement despite feeling stressed and distracted.
It is trying to get involved in your boyfriend’s hobbies and interests – even though it’s not your cup of tea.
So – if you want to start right away and work on understanding how to be a better girlfriend, be kind to the man of your choice!
It’s easy: Simply remind yourself of the beginnings of your relationship. Most likely you were very kind to him back then. Remind yourself of the many good reasons to be kind to him now as well.
7. Help Him where it’s needed
Men can get overwhelmed when they have to do everything themselves. A great way for you to show him your love and support is by lending a helping hand.
Is there anything that needs to be done, for which he can’t make time?
Maybe you can do it for him.
Even just offering your help will make a difference! An important task is better not to be postponed, and if it’s something dear to him, you might want to roll up your sleeves and get to work alongside him.
It’s easy: Check out what he needs and help. Write a to-do list if needed, and cross some things off, one by one.
8. Treat His Family and Friends with Respect
Friends and family are extremely important to get along with, if you want to stay with someone long-term.
One can only hope that they will treat you with the same respect that you should give them, in which case it’s a perfect match.
You should always start out with respect for anyone who’s a big part of his life, and treat them with kindness, dignity and affection.
It’s easy: Ask lots of questions about him and his childhood, which indicates sincere interest, and make sure that everyone feels comfortable and respected when they’re in your presence (as much as this can be in your control).
9. Surprise Him on Occasion
You will earn the “girlfriend of the year” award, if you sneak in a surprise here or there!
Our day-to–day functions can get boring and monotone, so he’ll love it when you plan a trip for an anniversary, or get tickets for a show and surprise him with it.
It can also be something much simpler, like cooking his favorite meal when he gets home, and giving him an unexpected massage after a long day’s work.
Everyone likes surprises that will get them out of their head and make them stop stressing for a while.
It’s easy: Surprise him regularly, and make it count! Think about what he would like, and reward him by giving him something that is not part of the daily routine.
10. Dress stunningly for Your weekly Date-Night
Obviously you don’t have to dress sexy in order to be noticed by him – he loves you regardless, but he will also be pleasantly surprised to see you in a hot outfit for the night!
As mentioned above, you should make an effort to have date-nights weekly, since this is your chance as a couple to bond and spend quality-time together.
When you go, get your nicest outfit from the closet and transform yourself as if you’d be going on a first date with him. He’ll notice, and absolutely love it!
It’s easy: Make plans with him, put some make-up on, and get your sexy ready for the evening.
11. Be the best Girlfriend by letting Him take charge during Sex
Sex is all about two people connecting and enjoying each other, and your satisfaction is equally important than his.
However, he’ll love to hear you say that he should take charge or pick what you’re going to do this time.
This doesn’t mean that you won’t like it, but only that you let him do the picking and taking control for once of the situation.
Even if you’re normally more dominant, for instance, give him that feeling of being the alpha male sometimes.
It’s easy: It means no work for you, so just let him take you wherever he wants you guys to go, and enjoy the ride. You might discover a new thing or two!
12. Stroke His Ego
This is cliché, yes, but still very relevant to today’s men.
Even the most modern of all guys will like to be complimented, cared for, and told how awesome he is.
You don’t have to do it every day, but the occasional “wow, you’re the smartest, babe” or “God, could you get any more delicious?” will make you stand out as a better girlfriend.
Be supportive and tell him directly whenever he does or says something great.
It’s easy: At times, talk to him like you would to a child (I know, but its true!): You’re doing great, keep going! You’ll motivate him and make him feel almighty.
13. Trust Him unconditionally
This one is a no-brainer, unless you have a solid reason to be suspicious.
Otherwise, trust him and don’t drive him away with unnecessary moments of jealousy. Women tend to overreact sometimes, and get jealous quickly.
That’s ok if he’s acting weird and secretive, but don’t confront him about anything, or make a scene if he gives you no reason to doubt him.
Then all you do is put a wedge between you and your man.
Despite previous cheating that you might have experienced with other men, give him a chance to show you that not all men are the same.
It’s easy: Have some faith and trust him!
14. A simple “I love You”
Often times we overlook the smallest things, like saying “I love you”.
We assume that our partner knows it, especially after being together for a long time, so at times we forget to say it, or simply don’t bother with it anymore.
That’s wrong! In order to be an awesome girlfriend, say it often, and mean it.
It’s easy: Say “I love you” regularly, and shower him with affection alongside it.
15. How to be the best Girlfriend in a long-term Relationship
Above tips will certainly help you a great deal in knowing how to improve as a girlfriend in order to build an even stronger relationship with the man of your choice.
However, extraordinary situations may require additional skills being applied to make it work.
Such extraordinary situation is present in a long-term relationship. Read on to get some helpful tips on being a good girlfriend in a long-term relationship.
- Make an extra Effort
Becoming a better girlfriend in a long-term relationship involves making an extra effort, going the extra mile, to stay in touch.
Do not let a long day at work get into the middle of your relationship but instead check in with him regularly.
Long-term relationships require the extra effort, so be honest with yourself and ask yourself regularly if you can honestly say you are going the extra mile to make it work.
- Do not blame him if Text/Skype/Phone Dates don’t always fit his Schedule
Long-distance relationships require more patience than “normal” relationships. In particular, you may not always be aware of your partner’s schedule.
Hence, in a long-term relationship you also need to make an extra effort not to get upset or impatient with him if he ends up cancelling a “phone-date” that you had been looking forward to.
Rest assured that he dislikes the situation probably as much as you do and make sure to reschedule a new date right away.
- Go on “remote Dates”
One way to do so is by watching a movie together. Easy enough done and what worked for Harry and Sally will surely not harm your relationship, either.
So check out the TV schedule or look for a Netflix movie that could be interesting for the both of you!
Moreover, it does not always have to be movies night. For example, if both of you enjoy cooking, you could simply cook (and then indulge in) your favorite meal together.
In times of video conferencing over Skype or iPhone / Android, very easy to do!
So where do you start?
How do you get a man to love you the way you want to be loved and cherished?
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How To Be a Better Girlfriend!