Save Your Marriage

Get the best advises on how to save your marriage from divorce before it is too late. Don’t give up! You may be able to fix or entirely save your marriage with these tips.

Why do Men lie in Relationships – and Ways to stop him!

Why do Men lie in Relationships – and the most effective Ways of making him stop lying

Can a woman in a relationship deal with a man who consistently lies? If so, then for how long? And why do men lie in relationships, anyway?

One of the biggest problems women face in their relationships and even in their marriages is a lying partner. Many relationships suffer from ‘exaggerated truths’ and ‘white lies’ which slowly eat at the trust that partners have towards each other. why do men lie

Some of those exaggerated truths and white lies are the result of partners trying to impress each other. Particularly when a relationship is just starting out.

However, if your boyfriend or husband is lying to you consistently, you need to take it seriously. It may reflect on a character trait they have built over years.

Sometimes a lie can also be indicative of issues in your relationship that you are not dealing with.

Let’s first look at some potential reasons behind why your man might be lying to you in the first place. We will then turn to answering the question how to make him stop lying.

You first and foremost need to know some potential reasons why most men lie to their girlfriends and wives.

1. Potential Reasons why many Men lie to their Partners

  • A man might lie to you because he does not want to hurt your feelings

When you have demonstrated to your man that you tend to be dramatic and upset when dealing with difficult truths, he might develop the tendency to lie. This is because he will be trying to keep peace when it comes to discussing difficult topics. Even if he might not lie out-rightly, he will tend to sugarcoat or avoid a volatile subject all together.

  • When a man perceives that there is no upside to telling the truth, he may choose to lie

If a man thinks that him telling the truth may not render any positive consequences, he may be tempted to lie so as to get out of a situation. Men are more practical while women lean towards being rather emotional. A man is more likely to say the truth when there is a chance that it will have a positive effect.

  • Some men lie because they want to impress you and they feel the truth might not be good enough

It depends on how you look at it. From one angle it might actually seem like a compliment because a man is just trying to please and impress you. However, objectively speaking this is far from being a compliment. Rather, it reflects on nothing else but essentially insecurity. It is an indication that your man is not comfortable being himself, not even with you.

This lack of self esteem and security can lead to a pattern of lying consistently and will only stop when a man starts being ‘real’ and authentic.

2. Effective Ways of making your Man stop Lying

Now that we looked at some potential reasons why do men lie to their partners, we can turn to answering the question of how to effectively make him stop telling you lies. Is he lying all the time to the point that it is seriously affecting your relationship? Don’t panic! Here are some ways you can stop his behavior.

  • Reasonably and objectively consider the context of your man’s lie or lies

If you catch your man lying or strongly believe he may have been lying to you, think about what might have triggered and motivated him to lie. Thinking about the context of the lie is important. It can help you ascertain why he needed to lie or felt the need to lie.

  • Never blame yourself for the lies that your man tells

A big reason why some men feel comfortable lying continuously to their partners is because they are or feel enabled to do so, by their partners. By taking the blame every time your man lies, you are helping him cover up for their bad behavior.

The bottom-line is that your boyfriend is an adult and as such is responsible for every action he takes consciously. No matter how you put it or the situation at hand, he had the choice to tell the truth but he chose to lie. Part of being in a mature and healthy relationship is taking the responsibility when you make a mistake.

  • Confront your partner when he lies with respect, honesty and openness

If you have caught him lying then you cannot simply demand and command him to stop lying. Instead, you need to confront him calmly and clearly. This will be a very tough conversation so here are some tips that can come in handy;

  • Rather than out-rightly calling him a liar or telling him ‘you are a liar’, give him a chance to be real and honest with you. Start the conversation gently by trying as much as you can to make your partner feel comfortable and not judged.
  • You want to really get to the bottom of why do men lie? Then make sure you use a polite and loving tone. Do not use the angry and judgmental tone that many women chose to go with. When you communicate in a calm and gentle way, your boyfriend will be more open and honest and you will be more likely to get to the bottom of the lie.
  • Have an in-depth, authentic and truthful conversation about the reasons he might have lied

Most of the best relationship advises for women available include tips to improve the relationship’s communication. Allow your boyfriend or husband to explain calmly why they chose to lie; however be very wary of the reasons he gives. Sometimes a man may just feel pressured to be honest. This discussion should take place sometime after the initial confrontation because it needs to happen when there is no tension or discomfort.

  • Make it very clear to your man that you do not appreciate being lied to, no matter the situation or reason

Once you have confronted them and then also allowed them to come clean, it is time to take your stance known. A good man will respect a woman who has strict principles and adheres to them; tell them exactly what you want but ensure that you are gentle and respectful as you do it. If you let your man get away with lying then there is a high likelihood that it will become the norm in your relationship.

Conclusion – Why do Men lie and what to do about it

A relationship is supposed to be a union of love and trust between two people. These two partners are supposed to appreciate and respect each other. Part of respect and appreciation is honesty. A woman needs to know when the lying is too much and reflects on a destructive pattern that can negatively impact your relationship.

We looked at potential reasons that can answer the question why do men lie in their relationships, in the first place.

But how about your own relationship? Does your man lie to you all the time? Do you find it hard to believe your boyfriend or husband? Have you confronted him countless times and the lying problem still persists? If your answer is YES to all these questions then you may want to consider whether it is worth being in a relationship based on lies.

Also read: Follow these Steps to stop Lying immediately

How to survive a Breakup – 15 Tips to move forward

15 Tips on how to survive a Breakup and what to do after a Breakup

A relationship usually begins with lots of giggles and romance. If not taken care of, however, a devastating breakup can easily follow shortly thereafter.surviving a breakup Being emotionally overwhelmed, many women struggle heavily with break-up situations. Let’s look at our best 15 tips on how to survive a breakup situation and what to do after a breakup, in order for you to move forward with your life!

What matters most is that you will move on without keeping any anguish or sad feeling inside of you.

TOP 15 Tips on how to survive a Breakup / what to do after a Breakup:

  1. Clear your Mind

  2. Sadness

  3. Supports

  4. Get rid of it

  5. Socialize

  6. Be happy, no Date

  7. Calm yourself for a few Minutes each day

  8. Determine where both of you stand in the Relationship

  9. Remove Items that connect both of you together

  10. Exchange personal Property with your Ex-Boyfriend

  11. You should avoid him

  12. Take care of Yourself

  13. Realize that Events in life do happen “for a Reason”

  14. Improve yourself

  15. Don’t be afraid to get Help from an Expert

1. Clear your Mind

The first thing to do is to sit quietly and to clear your mind of all the emotional pain you’re feeling. Try and think objectively about the issue. Ask yourself why this breakup occurred in the first place and how you could potentially be better off from this event, in the long run.

Clear your mind of the feelings you have for your partner for a moment and reassess whether the relationship is worth fighting for. If it is, there are things you can do to get your relationship back on track. But if you realize that you might be better off without your former partner, then it’s time to move on and to focus on ‘surviving the breakup’ and the emotional distress that comes with it, instead.

Also read: Learn how to save your Marriage

2. Sadness

Sadness is a normal feeling felt after a breakup, so try to accept it as normal. Being down after a breakup is very natural. Don’t be afraid to express your feelings. You can cry if you want to., or you could write a poem or a song. It’s up to you how you chose to express your sad feelings. Just express them. After that, you will feel better, already.
why he lies in a relationship

Click here for ‘Why He Lies in a Relationship” – helping you to survive the Breakup!

3. Supports

You should reach out to any possible support group of yours, loved ones, or friends. Talk to them. If they are your friends, they will listen to you. Talking about how you feel will help you loosen up.

Read also: How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship

4. Get rid of it

Throughout the duration of your relationship your ex-boyfriend probably gave you plenty of gifts and both of you have probably also plenty of pictures together. Get rid of all of it. Seeing those memorabilia will just constantly remind you of him.

This will slow down the coping process. So better get rid of all of it. If you cannot just let go of it completely, then get a box. Put all of it in the box and seal it and make sure it is hidden somewhere you will not likely open it, any time soon.

5. Socialize

Yes, socializing is the word. Face the world and enjoy. Socialize with your friends. Bond and catch up with your single friends. Who says being single isn’t fun? Being single is fun because you can do whatever you want to do with yourself. Some things being single are making life actually happier. Enjoy it while you still have it.

6. Be happy, no Date

Don’t rush things. Avoid rebound relationships. Those relationships often and quickly end up with failure. Finish first what you have started before entering into a new relationship. Prepare yourself first before getting into a new relationship hastily. Enjoy being single, for a while.

7. Calm yourself for a few Minutes each Day

Actively calm yourself down several times throughout the day, even though you might actually feel like screaming. When calming yourself for a few minutes each day, you will be able to listen to your ‘inner-you’ and in doing so you will be able to better understand what you’re going through.

In a situation shortly after a breakup, it is perfectly normal to be irrational. Only in calm moments will you be able to see what’s going on and will be able to navigate the situation you’re going through, effectively.

8. Determine where both of you stand in the Relationship

In learning how to survive a breakup and what to do after a breakup you’ve got to determine where you both stand in your relationship. It is certainly not easy if you both still feel some love for each other.

Do you think there is a chance that you may be able to repair the broken relationship and get back together for good? If so then you’ve got to evaluate your options and begin planning on how you are going to get back together.

9. Remove Items that connect both of you together

The next step in figuring out how to survive a breakup and what to do after a breakup is to remove all items that connect both of you. That way, you can emotionally disconnect from your former partner. Get rid of picture albums, remove clothing, remove gifts, and remove everything that reminds you of him. Moving forward becomes much easier that way.

You do not have to destroy all of these items, but do not have a picture on your wall with both of you hugging each other since it reminds you of the times you’ve spent together. Try to detach as quickly as possible.

10. Exchange personal Property with your Ex-Boyfriend

If you have decided that it is best for both you and your ex-boyfriend that the relationship never be revived, then so be it. In that case, many people have found it wise to symbolically finalize things with him by giving back each other’s personal property.

Arrange to meet your ex-boyfriend and exchange any personal property you may still have in each other’s possession.

11. You should avoid him

Avoid him! Well, this might sound a bit selfish. Yet, instead of thinking of his situation, focus on your own situation, right now. Deal with your personal sorrow. And avoid him as seeing him will make the healing process a lot slower and more difficult.

12. Take care of Yourself

While often neglected, this is the most important aspect to keep in mind as you’re working on surviving a recent breakup. It is quite common to feel a loss of appetite and the inability to get sleep at night. Yet,it is important that you do not change your normal routine about these things! Whether hungry or not, eat healthy food and go to bed the same time you usually do.

If you regularly exercise make sure that you do not miss your physical activities and, if possible, make them now even more challenging. On the other hand, if you have not been very physically active up until now, taking up a new sport or activity is a great way to provide you with some exercise to feel better and to also distract you from the breakup itself.

13. Realize that Events in Life do happen “for a Reason”

Try to appreciate and learn from the relationship that you had, but also accept that most relationships do end at some point and that life goes on for the best.

Deep inside, you know that people do eventually figure out how to survive a breakup situation they had to face and that they also usually figure out what to do after a breakup. And so will you. Ultimately, you will thrive in the future if you appreciate the lessons to be learned from each relationship, lessons about yourself, and lessons that can benefit you in future relationships.

14. Improve yourself

A very helpful step in working on how to survive a breakup is to take up a new hobby. Or get a makeover and reinvent your looks. Or do anything that makes you feel good about yourself.

Lingering over the painful breakup won’t help you. Instead, you should work on getting better and moving on. The easiest way to do this is to keep yourself occupied, for example by taking up a new hobby. This is the time for doing anything that you may have been postponing while being in your  relationship, because of one reason or another.

15. Don’t be afraid to get Help from an Expert

Some people can’t open up with their friends and loved ones. They prefer to go to the experts, whom they do not know. Well, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with seeing a counselor, quite the opposite! Professional counselors can usually help you even better than friends or family.

What to do after a Breakup – Final Thoughts

A breakup situation might present you with one of the hardest times of your life. But never forget that there are always people out there who are willing to lend a hand and help you get back on your feet.

And figuring out how to survive a breakup and what to do after a breakup, respectively, is just a life-challenge for you to take on. Follow above 15 tips and you are well on your way to a much brighter future. Remember, there’s always a rainbow after the rain.

Further Reading: The best Tips on How to get a new Boyfriend

How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship – Learn to Trust again

Tips on How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship

Is your relationship at a point where you actually wonder how to rebuild trust in a relationship?

When you first meet someone, and you get the feeling that you would like to get to know that person better, you make a snap judgment about your level of trust in that person right from the start. You do not realize you are doing it, even though you are.

Once any kind of trust in a relationship is damaged, you need to learn how to rebuild the trust in order for your relationship to move forward – if that is what you have decided to do.

The feeling that you cannot trust someone is going to dampen any hopes you may have of a relationship. If you feel that you can trust someone, you may start dating, but that is only the beginning of the equation. how to fix a broken relationship trust

Trust in your relationship has to be built over time. It can be the deciding factor for the longevity of any relationship.

One of the many reasons why learning to trust again is tough is because of how we view infidelity.

Many people, while wondering why do men cheat and lie, do believe that infidelity is unforgivable, but some try everything to regain the trust of their loved ones again.

If you are committed to rebuilding trust, it is important to face the fact that you’ll either be reconsidered or rejected. You need to work harder if you want to regain your loved one’s trust again.

But if you do get rejected, you need to stop and think about your actions and focus on never doing it again.

The Following is a Guide on How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship:

  1. Setting the boundaries

  2. Be calm and communicate

  3. Assurance

  4. Ensure that your love is always reaffirmed

  5. Tell your man what you need

  6. Be honest

  7. Make sure both your body language and your words match

  8. Don’t keep secrets

  9. Give it time

  10. Forget the past

  11. Deal with it

1. Setting the Boundaries

Learning to trust a partner once again is like going back to zero with a heavy load on your chest. It’s trying to forgive and forget with the hopes of building a better relationship.

Some couples can overcome this phase, particularly those who have a different problem instead of infidelity. Since, while it is not always apparent why men do cheat and lie, infidelity has more gravity than other reasons, so it is harder to regain trust in cases involving infidelity.

It is difficult to estimate how many have succeeded in giving their partners a second chance after an infidelity issue. But there are those who try to overcome this.

They sacrifice a lot more and really try to learn and understand how to rebuild trust in a relationship. And they work a lot harder at this than most couples with other problems.

You should clearly set your conditions if you truly want to trust your partner again. Make sure that your partner understands it and its consequences as well.

From there you can tell him that you’ll be objective with the renewed relationship with the hopes of regaining your trust in him.

learn how to rebuild trust in a relationship

2. Be Calm and Communicate

It is hard to learn how to rebuild trust in a relationship again once trust in your partner has been damaged. You can always begin this journey using honest, open and flowing communication.

This has been found to help many women find the right track for regaining lost love and trust, and to build an overall better and stronger relationship.

Talking is always the easiest way to resolve issues. If you’re jealous or a little bit insecure about something, don’t hide your feelings from your partner. Express that you’re upset but don’t nag or start blaming him for the issue (again).

Make it clear that you’re just trying to let him know what you’re going through so they can also make adjustments. Respect is vital in every relationship.

3. Assurance

You should frequently assure your partner of your love and commitment to him. You also need to prove it. Especially in the case of a break-up, your partner will naturally be vulnerable and insecure. He will have doubts that may remain for a long time.

In an attempt to get answers to the questions that he has, he will begin throwing questions at you regarding the reason you have lost trust in him or his trust in you.

This might happen even if you have explained everything to him earlier. Why? It is because he needs constant assurance from you. You should continually give him all of the information he needs.

Being a hundred percent honest is the most vital step to building a better and stronger relationship.

4. Ensure that Your Love is Always Reaffirmed

Apologizing for what happened is not good enough. The best way to fix trust in a broken relationship is by discussing how to mend the relationship.

Perhaps, before the infidelity, he may have disliked some things about you, and may not have seen an opportunity to let you know. You may need to make changes to both the relationship and yourself.

Engage yourself in activities that will strengthen the bond between you. This entails everything including going for romantic vacations or engaging in weekly activities.

5. Tell Your Man What You Need

Don’t make him guess. Rebuilding trust in a relationship isn’t a game. When someone has to guess, there is always a chance they will guess wrong.

If they guess wrong, you may become frustrated and your relationship will suffer unnecessarily. Instead, when you tell your partner what you need they at least have the opportunity to get it right. And being right is good for both of you.

Make it easy for your partner to be right, and you’ll get what you need.

Oh, and anything that begins with, “If you loved me…” will be seen as plain old manipulation which destroys trust.

The truth is, you build trust in a relationship by telling each other your needs.

why he lies in a relationship

Click here to watch this featured Presentation on ‘Why He Lies in a Relationship”

6. Be Honest

You should be honest about what you need and expect from him, and don’t leave him guessing. When you both know what you want from each other and you also know that you’re willing to provide it, only then can you trust each other to do so.

You can’t always expect your partner to know exactly what you want and it isn’t fair to assume that they just will.

Being honest about needs and evaluating how to stop lying is a great way to build trust in a relationship.

7. Make Sure Both Your Body Language and Your Words Match

You must communicate convincingly and credibly. Your man is not going to believe you if you tell him you are happy while carrying a frown on your face.

Your guy will be able to trust your message only if your body language matches your words.

8. Don’t Keep Secrets

Secrets destroy any kind of trust in a relationship. Be honest and open. Assume that everything will eventually come out. Keeping secrets requires enormous amount of energy on your part. That is energy that could be going into building the relationship.

9. Give it Time

Trust needs time to grow. It can’t happen overnight. Don’t pressure yourself. It will also take time to actually understand, learn and then implement the steps necessary to rebuild trust in a relationship.

Do not worry. You have plenty of time to each prove your worth to each other.

10. Forget the Past

The past always seems to catch up with us, however, when you’re in a relationship, learn to steer clear of any past issues such as exes, small misgivings, mistakes and broken promises.

Sure, they can shake your trust in your partner, but stay focused on the present and the future. It’s a complete waste if you keep on bringing back something from the past that cannot be changed at this point. Learn to appreciate what’s here and now.

11. Deal With It

Sometimes it’s just paranoia when we’re having trouble trusting our partners. Before resolving relationship trust issues, resolve your personal issues. Love yourself, lessen feelings of being insecure and value the love you’re feeling.

Learning how to rebuild trust in a relationship and how to trust your partner after a stormy relationship takes time and extra effort. There is no guarantee that one person in the relationship can just swallow his/her pride and forgive without regrets.

Remember that learning how to rebuild trust in a relationship should be a joint effort because both of you will benefit from it. Relationships can be easy. In order to understand what makes a man fall in love, you just have to learn to compromise and communicate with your partner.

How to save your Relationship – 5 crucial Steps

How to save your Relationship before it is too late

We are living in a day and age when relationships between opposite sexes are as skewed as they are complicated. Do you feel you might be in a similar situation? Are you anxious to learn how to save your relationship before it might be too late? Read on. how to save your relationship

Never before have we witnessed the dire need for couple therapy as part of many relationships as in the past two decades.

It’s almost like the tired cliche of “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus” is catching up with millennials as soon as they started their committed relationship.

And while there isn’t a single rule-book or secret formula for a blissful union, here are some helpful tips that you can use to save your relationship (if you are in a marriage instead, read this article here on how to save your marriage). They are particularly helpful if it already looks like a split might be inevitable.

No single Rule-Book, but 5 helpful Tips that will help your Partnership

  1. Listen to him – Don’t play the Victim

  2. Spend some Time apart to make Reconciliation easier

  3. How to save your Relationship: forgive and forget

  4. Shower him with random Acts of Kindness

  5. Stop the Blame Game

1. Listen to him – Don’t play the Victim

Most relationship experts will agree that the first sign of any cracks in a partnership is lack of, or poor communication between the two partners. More often than not, it is  communication, and not just romance – which tends to wither off with time and has to be rekindled – that glues a partnership together.

The moment the lines of communication are severed, the inevitable road to a decline of an otherwise great relationship begins. And this road often ends with a break-up.

Hence, in order to understand how to save your relationship, you need to first work on improving the overall communication. Luckily for us women, most of us have excellent communication skills, unlike men who struggle to express themselves coherently.

But at the same time, most women will rarely stop and listen to their partner in light of an imminent separation. This is particularly true nowadays, in times when society will by default side with the woman in the event of a failed relationship or marriage. Therefore, it is up to you as the woman to give your man the chance to express himself without  claiming high moral ground in your arguments.

Additionally, you can plan on seeing a couple therapist together should you fail to reach a point of reconciliation or consensus without external help.

2. Spend some Time apart to make Reconciliation easier

We can often only see and notice the value of something when it is gone from our life. Similarly, sometimes it becomes necessary for a couple to spend some time apart in order to re-discover what both partners mean to each other. That may give a good chance to rekindle the lost flame.

Spending some time away from your partner makes it also easier to really reflect on whether the relationship is actually worth it or not, without feeling pressured from actually being together at the time.

It is important to realize that couples often make decisions to separate temporarily in haste, mostly out of anger and bitterness after a series of disagreements. Yet, the importance of taking a break from a tumultuous relationship is even clearer if she feels wronged or violated.

The short separation or distance from a partner can allow both of you some space. It will also provide time to heal and to make some decisions. It will allow you to think and reflect rationally about the importance of the partnership and whether it is worth saving.

Lastly, your partner will get an idea of what it means to be without you and vice-versa. This might soften the hard hearts, heal the hurt and improve the chances of the relationship surviving.

3. How to save your Relationship: forgive and forget

One of the strengths of the feminine spirit is the ability to love unconditionally and to also forgive sincerely. If your partner has come clean and apologized sincerely for a wrong he did, it is best to forgive him and to also learn how to rebuild trust in a relationship.

Give him a chance to redeem himself. Not only will this help to significantly patch up the struggling relationship. It will also make you feel better about yourself as a person.

And it shouldn’t just end with forgiveness. Don’t make the common mistake of ‘forgiving’ your partner yet actually holding on to the same past wrongs they already apologized for. This also means that you shouldn’t bring them up in future arguments. Simply find a way to forgive and let time heal the hurt or heartbreak.

4. Shower him with random Acts of Kindness

One of the best ways of saving a challenged relationship is to actually be nice to a person when they least deserve or expect it. Performing such ‘random’ act of kindness not only portrays to your man that you deeply care about him; it also shows that you are willing to put your pride and ego aside to allow the relationship to flourish. Human beings are hard-wired to appreciate kindness, particularly when it comes unexpected.

Doing so will serve another good purpose: it will help yourself to change your perception and attitude towards your man. You’ll start seeing your man in a different, more positive light which will help additionally in mending your relationship.

5. Stop the Blame Game

You want to make sure you understand how to save your relationship? Then stop the blame game! Just before a nasty break-up most couples will engage in a never-ending blame – battle. Each party will be trying to justify their own behavior while painting the other one in the worst possible light.

This not only does little or nothing to make you feel better about the state of your relationship itself. Instead, avoiding the vicious circle of piling blames on each other will by itself significantly improve your relationship.

Always remember the saying that ‘it takes two to tangle‘. It is very unlikely for only one party to be solely responsible for any misunderstanding arising between the both of you.

You might feel like you are the aggrieved party. But claiming high moral ground and blaming your spouse blindly will definitely not help, but hurt the chances of saving your relationship.

Read more: Relationship Advice for Women and understanding Men

Why Men Pull Away in a Relationship – And how to Stop them

Have you ever felt frustrated because you can’t get a man to commit to you fully? Do you wonder why men pull away, instead of getting closer to you in your relationship?

You’ve tried everything, cooked, cleaned the house in suspenders, had you hair done, appeased him sexually, accompanied him to the football game.

But yet, you experience the same pattern in all of your relationships, everything appears to be going great in your eyes, and then he starts to pull away! He becomes distant, stops calling as much as he used to, the affection comes to a halt, and before you know it, you are having that talk where he says, “It’s not you, it’s me!”

why men pull away

He may not even have the courage to tell you face-to-face; you hang up the phone in a flood of tears, get together with the girls, eat loads of ice-cream and chocolate, and have a grand pity party!

Why Men Pull Away – Tried and True Techniques to make Him Stop pulling away

After a few months, you decide to try again; you get your heels on, get glammed up and hit the town in search of Mr. Right! Does this sound familiar? If you can relate to any of these points, then keep reading.

After a string of failed relationships, I too got sick and tired of being sick and tired, and decided to turn things around in my life. After copious amounts of research, I discovered that there were tried, tested and proven techniques that will make men fall head-over-heels in love with you.

With a minimal amount of effort, you will have men eating out the palm of your hand in no time at all. Keep reading to find out why men often pull away in their relationships and how you can become the woman of his dreams that will keep him around.

  1. Know what you want

  2. Remain unique

  3. Get over it

  4. Emotional intelligence

  5. Why men pull away – final thoughts

1. Know What You Want

When you know what you want out of life and you are not prepared to compromise, it makes you extremely attractive.

When you have a clear-cut goal for your life, understand your purpose and you are taking strides towards your dreams, you will begin to attract all that you want out of life.

Your life is all about becoming the best that you can be. When you are uncertain of who you are, and what you want, you fall into relationships where you are always only supporting the man at your side.

Have you not noticed that the men you attract are not quite certain of what they want out of life? You then become a crutch to them, supporting them as they attempt to fulfill one of their many goals, that don’t seem to go anywhere.

Like attracts like, and if you are not living your life driven towards your purpose, you are going to attract men with exactly the same mindset.

Your life is about your vision, your hopes, your dreams and your destiny. When you are clear about your life’s purpose, including the type of man that you want, you will attract just that. This is also maybe the best relationship advice for women that one can give.

infographic_why_men_pull_away

2. Remain Unique

Many women make the mistake of trying to model themselves after the latest, hottest celebrity, believing that men want their women to look a certain way.

This is the biggest lie that the media sells! Not all men want a leggy blonde with big breasts and blue eyes. In fact, research shows that men actually prefer intelligence when it comes to looking for a serious relationship.

A study conducted by University of Cambridge Professor David Bainbridge found that men look for intelligence in a long-term partner. This is because it is an indication that she is capable of successfully raising children.

So wash off the fake tan and cancel the boob job operation. And instead, start working on becoming the best you that you can be!

Do some soul-searching and find out what your best qualities are, and then work on perfecting them. Trying to be someone else takes way too much energy; why not expend it on improving your true self, instead of trying to be what society says you should be.

Men admire this quality in women because it demonstrates strength and confidence. Believe it or not, real men don’t want a woman who is going to say, “How high?” whenever they say, “Jump.” Men want a woman that they can respect and who challenges them, someone that they won’t be able to treat as a doormat.

3. Get Over It

Women like to carry their baggage into the next relationship. This is one of the biggest mistakes that you can make. A man doesn’t want to have to take the blows that you wish you could have inflicted on your former partner. Neither does he want you to compare him to anyone else. If you are not yet over your last relationship, don’t be so hasty to rush into another.

When you stop allowing the noxious men from your past to haunt you, and allow yourself to believe that there are good men out there, you will begin to attract just that, good men! Remember, you are what you think! The more you think about something, the faster it will turn into reality.

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4. Emotional Intelligence

Women are naturally emotional, we think with our feelings and not with our brains. Men absolutely hate this quality in a woman and often one main reason why men pull away in a relationship. Why? Because they think logically, and to them, an overly emotional woman is downright annoying!

As a woman, you should know how to monitor your emotions and manage them effectively.

When your emotional intelligence is at a high level your view of the world becomes clearer. You will begin to understand not just your own emotions, but you will also be able to tune into the emotions of those around you. That way you can then adjust your behavior, accordingly.

This type of woman is extremely attractive to a man. Sometimes men just want to be left alone. They don’t want to talk or do anything other than what they were doing when you decided to ask them what was wrong, and whether they want to talk. The moment you can understand a man’s emotional needs he will want to be around you more often.

5. Why Men Pull Away – Final Thoughts

You are not going to roll out of bed tomorrow and become the world’s most desirable woman. It is going to take a bit of effort on your part.

I recommend that you take a break from the dating game. Get yourself together by putting the things that we have discussed in this article into practice, instead of worrying why men pull away. You will see, before you know it, the man of your dreams will come sauntering into your life.

Further Reading: The best Tips on How to save Your Marriage from Divorce

How to Win Him back in 5 easy Steps – Get Him Back without seeming Desperate

The 5 – Step Plan on How to win him back … and keep him around

So you and your boyfriend broke up but deep down you want him back. Breakups can be confusing and emotionally draining which is why many women are bound to make a lot of mistakes that hurt their chances of getting back together with their Ex’s. Yet, constantly reflecting on how to win him back will make you appear desperate and needy to the rest of the world – including your ex.

Instead, follow below 5 rules for a very good change on winning him back. And, in case you decided to NOT try and get back with your Ex, read our article here on how to get over your ex.

how to get him back

The TOP 5 “Rules” on Winning him back

  1. The ‘No Contact’ Rule

  2. Get busy with Life

  3. Re-establish Contact

  4. Ask Him out

  5. Be the Prize to be won

Let’s go over those 5 steps, one by one, to make sure we cover it all.

Recommended Reading: Should I get back with my Ex?!

1. The ‘No Contact’ Rule

Cut off all communication with your Ex for at least 66 days. What? That does sound crazy, doesn’t it! And why 66 days? Because according to Phillipa Lally, a health psychology researcher at University College London, it takes more than two months for someone to adjust to a new situation.

Delete your ex’s number, unfriend him on all social media sites and delete his email contact. Cutting off all contact will help you to:

  • Take a step back and analyze your relationship. It’s much easier to see a relationship for what it really is (or was) when you are no longer in it. You will be able to see all the flaws in it and what you could have done differently to improve the situation.More importantly, you will be able to see if you were a good match for each other in the first place.
  • Heal and move on. After 66 days of no contact, you’ll know whether you really want to get back with your ex or not. But when you are in constant contact with him, you won’t be able to tell whether you want him back out of neediness and loneliness or whether you genuinely love him.
  • Improve yourself. Your self-esteem probably took a hit when your boyfriend broke up with you. You are probably feeling like you are not good enough for him or for any other man. If you are feeling this way, it’s not a good idea to try and get back with your Ex.Your insecurities will make you appear needy and desperate because you will be relying on his response to feel good about yourself. Don’t give him this power over you.

2. Get busy with Life

Overall, try to completely forget about thinking about how to how to win him back or on the next steps on how to get him back. Instead, get busy with your life! Join a karate class. Go on a trip. Reconnect with an old friend. Volunteer at your church. Do all the things that you wanted to do but couldn’t because you were in a relationship. Don’t sit idle or waddle in self-pity.

Staying busy will help you to:

  • Maintain the no contact rule. Your mind will be so occupied that you won’t have time to obsess over him or the good memories that you had together.

3. Re-establish Contact

So it’s been 66 days and you feel that you want to give your relationship with your Ex another shot. Good for you. However, before you pick up the phone to dial his number, ask yourself one question…

Will you be okay if he doesn’t want to reconnect? If the answer is no, then you are probably not ready to re-establish contact with him. Remember that in order to get back with your Ex, you need to be in total control of your emotions. His response to you should not determine your happiness.

If, however, you are sure you will be okay regardless of the response you may get from him, shoot him a casual text or email. Keep it friendly and see how he responds. Remind him of a good moment that you both had while you were dating.

Don’t double text him if he doesn’t respond. Wait a few days before sending him another text. If he doesn’t respond then it’s best to you move on or wait for him to respond. But you shouldn’t hold your breath waiting for a response.

4. Ask Him out

Assuming your Ex responded positively and things are going well, it’s time to call him and ask him out. Don’t tell him that you want to get back together. He will become defensive. Keep everything casual. Let him wonder what you are up to.

Don’t beg or push him to go out with you. While on the date, don’t talk about your breakup or your past relationship. Focus on having fun.

5. Be the Prize to be won

You want your Ex to think that it was his idea to get back together. The best way to do this is to let him come to you. After going out with him, don’t call him, wait for him to call you. Don’t obsess over how to win him back.

If you feel the urge to contact him again, wait for a week to call him. Your relationship should develop organically so if you find that you are the one always initiating the dates, calls or texts, it’s time to take a step back.

In the meantime, you should be out meeting new guys and enjoying your life as a single woman until your Ex decides to “lock you down”. Fixating on your Ex will drive him away.

If anything, you should be a limited prize edition. A man will only chase after something that he fears he might lose. If he sees that some other man will snag you if he doesn’t act fast, he will do everything in his will power to make you his again. But if he sees that you are available and eager to get back with him, he won’t be motivated to fight to keep you around.

How to win him back … some final Words on Neediness, Mindset, and Desperation

The key to getting back with an Ex is to avoid coming across as needy or desperate. Neediness is a mindset. If you want to get back with your Ex because it will make you feel a certain way, that’s neediness.

If you want to get back with him because you fear he will move on, that’s desperation. You need to get over him in order to get him back. Live life for yourself, not for the sake of figuring out how to win him back.

And lastly, you have to know when to throw in the towel. If he isn’t chasing, you should back up after a certain amount of time and really move on with you life without him.

How to make Him want You back – The 15 best Tips!

The best 15 Tricks how to make him want You back!

If you want to know how to make him want you back, then you probably still have plenty of feelings for that guy; and those feelings are worth fighting for. how to make him want you back

They say that no woman should ever give up without a good fight; and if your man is truly important to you, you should at least attempt to win him back to the best you can.

A breakup is often one of the worst things that a lady would have to go through – but this does not mean that you should lose hope and quit on your relationship all too easily.

The same holds true if you haven’t actually broken up but if you and your partner currently simply do not feel the deep connection you used to have.

15 great Tips on how to make him want You back:

  1. Assess your Feelings

  2. Know Why He Had Left You or Vice Versa

  3. Resolve the Problem

  4. Reconstruct His Self-Esteem

  5. Become the Girl he used to love

  6. Do not attempt to mother him

  7. Do not expect Changes

  8. Consider what he feels

  9. Give him some Time alone

  10. Say sorry and act on your Apology

  11. Learn to forgive and forget

  12. Stop expecting him to live up to your Dreams

  13. Stop making impossible Demands

  14. Let him see the real You shining through

  15. Love him as he is. Stop trying to change him

1. Assess your Feelings

So, the realization and neediness is pouring back in. But, are you sure that those emotions are still for him? Sometimes, after a breakup, it is normal for either side to feel useless and discarded, especially if they are the ones being dumped.

This feeling is amplified even more if it was a long-term relationship. It’s perfectly normal, considering that you’ve been dependent on him for a long time and having your anchor suddenly yanked from you.

So, what you need to do is to look deep into yourself and know your heart.

What are the deeper reasons you are wondering of how to make him want you back? Do you want him back because you’re feeling sorry for yourself? Or sorry for him? Maybe, you just hate being single. Know the responses to these questions before even thinking of how to make your ex boyfriend want you back.

Read here: On how to save your Marriage

2. Know Why He Had Left You or Vice Versa

The next step is to go back and review the reasons why your relationship with him failed in the first place. This is the most practical step in learning on how to make him want you back. Normally, the reasons for a breakup are simple and plain. Understand those reasons very well as a starting point for the next steps.

3. Resolve the Problem

After reviewing and evaluating the potential reasons for the break – up (make sure you hereby answered to yourself all questions about your past relationship and its failure as honestly as possible), it’s time for you to think on how to solve those past problems.

This is the time for you to change your bad old traits. Do whatever you can do to get him back but make sure not to go to the point of begging or crying.
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4. Reconstruct His Self-Esteem

In case you were the one who left him, you must be prepared to rebuild his self-confidence or self-esteem. Men are known to be the stronger and braver race but your actions that led to the breakup might have affect his self-esteem and damaged it, severely.

5. Become the Girl he used to love

People do change as time passes, and there are chances that you have become another person in some ways. You should take a look back and find out about the girl you used to be when he was head over heels in love with you.

Determine the things that used to floor him, and go back to those that are sure to turn him on.

Determine the ways in which you have changed and make proper adjustments. Perhaps you have shifted the goal posts in some way. If you want to know how to get a guy back, you need to find a way of charming him.

6. Do not attempt to mother him

While you may be totally focused on the question of how to make your ex want you back, you may not realize it, but you may be driving your guy away by being too demanding. Remember that he is an independent person with personal preferences.

Respect his likes and dislikes and avoid trying to manipulate him to fit your imagination. Instead of trying to change him, try to recall the things that drew you to him at the beginning.

7. Do not expect Changes

Perhaps you are not trying to change him, but you still want him to change anyway. You will only be frustrated when you expect changes that are not forthcoming. Accept him just as he is.

8. Consider what he feels

When it comes to their emotions, guys are good at not being too vocal of what they feel. But guys have emotions too. They also get hurt as much as girls do. If you want to get him back, you have to consider the things you’ll say to him.

9. Give him some Time alone

Breakups are painful even to the one who initiated them. If he broke up with you, then you have to give him a little alone time. Respect his space. Want to know how to make your ex want you back? Let him think things out and do not pressure him into talking to you. Giving him space sometimes results in him being really drawn to you and is often a perfect way of making a guy like you again.

You will also need this time off to think about the things that happened. Take this alone time to examine your feelings. This time apart from each other might be good for both of you.

10. Say sorry and act on your Apology

I case you feel it in your heart that you love this guy and that want him back, then you have to apologize. If swallowing your pride would win him back, you have to admit that you were wrong.

You have to be sincere in your apology. It’s not just saying sorry; you have to mean it. If he feels your sincerity and accepts your apology, it could be the start of a long process of healing and getting back together.

Don’t just talk the talk without walking the walk. You should be able to show the strides you’ve made. Even if you’re not successful initially, show him that you’ve been trying. And you have to remember to do it all the time instead of just being a different person whenever he’s around.

11. Learn to forgive and forget

The process of healing the relationship will also involve him apologizing for his mistakes. Both of you should learn to forgive each other and completely forget everything. This is important if you want to move forward with the relationship.

12. Stop expecting him to live up to your Dreams

Dreams are great when you’re sleeping. They are even good for helping you set goals for yourself. Dreams become problematic when you start holding your boyfriend, the man you are supposed to love above all others, responsible for being the man of your dreams.

Even if he’s the man of your dreams, you shouldn’t expect him to live up to expectations based on someone or something that isn’t even real.

13. Stop making impossible Demands

Still trying to figure out how to make him want you back? The fewer demands you make of the man in your life the greater the odds that you will manage to figure out how to get a guy back. Breakup decisions are hard for everyone involved. Avoid it if possible by not making demands that are impossible to live up to.

14. Let him see the real You shining through

You need to let him see the bright, sparkly, vivacious woman that he met come shining through if you want to make this thing work. Make sure you get back into good shape! You need to get in shape for the sake of yourself, anyways. The added advantage is that you will appear more enticing to the opposite sex as well as the one man you want most to win over.

15. Love him as he is and stop trying to change him

You obviously love him if you are trying to figure out how to make him want you back. Why on earth would you then, in the next breath, try to change the person you claim to love?

If you don’t love him as he is, warts and all, it may be time for you to move on. But you should be careful that you don’t push the next great guy in your life away by constantly seeking to turn him into someone he is not.

Both of you have to realize that nobody is perfect. You have to understand each other, not tolerate each other’s shortcomings but to understand and support each other.

Final Thoughts to remember

Every breakup has a reason, will it be simple or plain. However, you must keep in mind that there are simple and easy solutions to reconstruct it. If you are willing to take a stab at figuring guys out, you can have the key to how to get your man back in your hand almost instantly. It’s the quickest, easiest, and most likely to succeed way to bring him back into your arms and make a guy fall in love with you (again).

The above tips and strategies will help you figuring out all the steps necessary to learn how to make him want you back.

Further Reading: Our best Tips on how to survive the Break-up

How to Save Your Marriage – Try these 6 Easy Steps

“Save my Marriage” Advice … for a Lifelong Commitment

Are you desperate to learn how to save your marriage? Marriage is meant to be a lifelong commitment. The beautiful day you wear your wedding dress and walk down the aisle to meet the man you deem fit to be your life partner is marked by promises of standing by each other till death.how to save your marriage

However, the statistics in this regard are fairly dismal! Close to 50% of marriages nowadays end in divorce.

The end of a marriage is devastating, apart from losing your life-partner, people usually also lose security,  self-confidence, a friend, a confidant and most of all, love and companionship.

No wonder many women are looking for advice on how to fix a marriage before it potentially ends in divorce. The situation is even worse if there are any children involved. In such cases divorce will not only affect the couple itself but will also have a lasting impact on the kids’ lives.

The modern woman may pride herself on career success and financial security. However, it is undeniable that it is mostly having a husband and a family that makes women feel complete, content and loved.

Is your marriage in trouble? Don’t worry, every marriage goes through difficult times. Understand that every marriage that lasts and ‘survives’ takes extra effort from both partners – over an extended period of time.

Here are 6 steps a woman can take to learn how to fix a marriage that is on the brink of divorce.

6 Steps on How to Save Your Marriage

  1.  Take the time to listen to your partner

  2.  Find a calm and gentle way to express your feelings and opinions

  3.  Depending on the state of your relationship – consider taking some time apart

  4.  Find it in your heart to forgive and try as much as you can to forget

  5.  Find shared goals and objectives and focus your energies on achieving them together

  6.  Work on your sex life

1. Take the Time to Listen to Your Partner

The first advice on ‘how to save my marriage’ is to actually realize that marriages don’t break down without a reason. Instead, it is often because both parties have issues and needs that are not being met.

This is why marriage counseling can be a very effective way to work on fixing your marriage. Simply listening to your partner, without judging or interrupting, can help you identify and understand what is really going wrong in your relationship.

Knowing the problem is the first step to saving a marriage because only then have you identified what needs to be worked on. Communication breakdown is the root-cause of divorce; failing to understand each other turns every conversation into an argument and living with your partner becomes unbearable.

how to save my marriage

2. Find a Calm and Gentle Way to Express Your Feelings and Opinions

The second advice on how to save your marriage is to always remind yourself of the fact that women in general are highly emotional beings, and then to act accordingly.

We are happiest when all our emotional needs are met. Therefore, after listening to your partner, it is only fair and reasonable for you to then also express your own feelings and emotions.

However, it might not always be easy for you to express your difficulties, mistakes, embarrassments and frustrations to the person you love.

If it turns out to be too difficult, then look for a mediator or a marriage counselor. Such a counselor will give you the courage to speak your mind, while keeping the discourse rational.

Here are some things to keep in mind while expressing yourself to your partner

  • Be completely honest
  • Do not apportion blame
  • Love is brittle, choose words that do not emasculate or embarrass your partner
  • Take full responsibility for everything that you are sure of is your fault. This will create room for your partner to likewise accept his role in the marriage being in trouble
  • Be straightforward and leave nothing unsaid to avoid bitterness or resentment later

3. Depending on the State of Your Relationship – Consider Taking some Time Apart

As you are reading this article on how to save your marriage, you are probably driven to get connected and to get together with your partner again, as soon as possible.

However, realize that sometimes partners need to spend time apart to understand just how much value the other person adds to their life. The time apart will help to organize your thoughts and feelings and also to rediscover who you are as an individual, outside or apart from your marriage.

Contrary to popular misconception, marriage should not be a union between two halves to make one whole. Rather, it should be a union between two fairly complete and emotionally healthy people who make the conscious decision to build a life together.

Marriages start having problems when each partner loses herself / himself in the marriage. Being apart for some time can give each of you the opportunity to build yourself so that you can have more to offer again in your marriage.

Strive to be stable, independently minded, happy and content as an individual. Then you will be able to love another person without expecting too much in return.save your marriage free info presentation

Click here to watch this incredible free presentation on how to save your marriage … starting today!

4. Find it in Your Heart to Forgive and Try as much as You Can to Forget

Many women can forgive but often have an extremely hard time forgetting. Yet, one thing that can severely drag a marriage down is holding on to your partner’s past wrongs.

To err is human and if you are committed to making your marriage work then you have to let go of the past. If you hold on to past mistakes then you are building resentment and bitterness which is nothing but a time-bomb waiting to eventually explode.

If you keep digging up things from the past whenever you are aggrieved then you will only upset your partner and lose his trust. Your marriage will only last if you give your partner a clean slate he can start over with.

However, don’t bend over backwards to please an unwilling partner. Your forgiveness should always depend on your partner’s ability to honestly apologize and to make changes moving forward.

Do you find it hard to forgive? That is entirely human. But if you really want to learn how to save your marriage then you also need to learn how to forgive.

Here are a few simple ways to greatly enhance your ability to forgive

  • Remind yourself why you fell in love and made the decision to get married
  • Appreciate the good things your partner does and avoid demonizing every little mistake he may make
  • Random acts of kindness from your partner can soften your heart and help you forgive and forget

5. Find Shared Goals and Objectives and Focus Your Energies on Achieving them Together

A marriage will only work if you still want, at least to some extent, the same things in life.

Common goals and projects shared with your partner make you more than just a married couple. They transform you into life partners who have the same targets. They also give you a reason to spend time together.

6. Work on Your Sex Life

button to follow us on twitterLove and marriage need sex to survive and thrive. Men are highly visual, while women are more emotional. No matter how long you have been married, take the time to seduce and excite your husband. Experiment and be sexually adventurous.

Here are 5 Amazing Books that will Help You Work on Your Sex Life

Try to get your hands on at least a few of them. Doing so will ultimately help you a great deal to learn how to save your marriage.

Final Thoughts on ‘How to Save My Marriage’

Still not quite sure how to save your marriage? One of the most important but often completely neglected ‘save my marriage’ advice is to actually try very hard to be nice to your partner. This alone could save your marriage!

Though ignored by many women, the power and strength of a woman in a marriage is not how much she brings in financially, or how hard you complain; your strength is love, humility, gentleness and self-control.

Sounds like a cliché, right? You will be surprised how far a little bit of thoughtfulness can go in softening your husband’s heart, no matter what state your relationship is in.

Additionally, if you are kind, caring and loving then you can easily find out whether also your partner is willing to work on your marriage.

Sometimes marriages end because partners focus on wrong doings, bitterness and proving a point. As a woman, take the initiative to be the ‘bigger person’. Take the high road. This is the best way to find out if your marriage can be saved or not.

Recommended: Why do some Men like to cheat and lie?

Also Read: The best female Relationship authors – April Beyer reviews and Meredith Goldstein love letters.