How to save your Relationship before it is too late
We are living in a day and age when relationships between opposite sexes are as skewed as they are complicated. Do you feel you might be in a similar situation? Are you anxious to learn how to save your relationship before it might be too late? Read on.
Never before have we witnessed the dire need for couple therapy as part of many relationships as in the past two decades.
It’s almost like the tired cliche of “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus” is catching up with millennials as soon as they started their committed relationship.
And while there isn’t a single rule-book or secret formula for a blissful union, here are some helpful tips that you can use to save your relationship (if you are in a marriage instead, read this article here on how to save your marriage). They are particularly helpful if it already looks like a split might be inevitable.
No single Rule-Book, but 5 helpful Tips that will help your Partnership
Listen to him – Don’t play the Victim
Spend some Time apart to make Reconciliation easier
How to save your Relationship: forgive and forget
Shower him with random Acts of Kindness
Stop the Blame Game
1. Listen to him – Don’t play the Victim
Most relationship experts will agree that the first sign of any cracks in a partnership is lack of, or poor communication between the two partners. More often than not, it is communication, and not just romance – which tends to wither off with time and has to be rekindled – that glues a partnership together.
The moment the lines of communication are severed, the inevitable road to a decline of an otherwise great relationship begins. And this road often ends with a break-up.
Hence, in order to understand how to save your relationship, you need to first work on improving the overall communication. Luckily for us women, most of us have excellent communication skills, unlike men who struggle to express themselves coherently.
But at the same time, most women will rarely stop and listen to their partner in light of an imminent separation. This is particularly true nowadays, in times when society will by default side with the woman in the event of a failed relationship or marriage. Therefore, it is up to you as the woman to give your man the chance to express himself without claiming high moral ground in your arguments.
Additionally, you can plan on seeing a couple therapist together should you fail to reach a point of reconciliation or consensus without external help.
2. Spend some Time apart to make Reconciliation easier
We can often only see and notice the value of something when it is gone from our life. Similarly, sometimes it becomes necessary for a couple to spend some time apart in order to re-discover what both partners mean to each other. That may give a good chance to rekindle the lost flame.
Spending some time away from your partner makes it also easier to really reflect on whether the relationship is actually worth it or not, without feeling pressured from actually being together at the time.
It is important to realize that couples often make decisions to separate temporarily in haste, mostly out of anger and bitterness after a series of disagreements. Yet, the importance of taking a break from a tumultuous relationship is even clearer if she feels wronged or violated.
The short separation or distance from a partner can allow both of you some space. It will also provide time to heal and to make some decisions. It will allow you to think and reflect rationally about the importance of the partnership and whether it is worth saving.
Lastly, your partner will get an idea of what it means to be without you and vice-versa. This might soften the hard hearts, heal the hurt and improve the chances of the relationship surviving.
3. How to save your Relationship: forgive and forget
One of the strengths of the feminine spirit is the ability to love unconditionally and to also forgive sincerely. If your partner has come clean and apologized sincerely for a wrong he did, it is best to forgive him and to also learn how to rebuild trust in a relationship.
Give him a chance to redeem himself. Not only will this help to significantly patch up the struggling relationship. It will also make you feel better about yourself as a person.
And it shouldn’t just end with forgiveness. Don’t make the common mistake of ‘forgiving’ your partner yet actually holding on to the same past wrongs they already apologized for. This also means that you shouldn’t bring them up in future arguments. Simply find a way to forgive and let time heal the hurt or heartbreak.
4. Shower him with random Acts of Kindness
One of the best ways of saving a challenged relationship is to actually be nice to a person when they least deserve or expect it. Performing such ‘random’ act of kindness not only portrays to your man that you deeply care about him; it also shows that you are willing to put your pride and ego aside to allow the relationship to flourish. Human beings are hard-wired to appreciate kindness, particularly when it comes unexpected.
Doing so will serve another good purpose: it will help yourself to change your perception and attitude towards your man. You’ll start seeing your man in a different, more positive light which will help additionally in mending your relationship.
5. Stop the Blame Game
You want to make sure you understand how to save your relationship? Then stop the blame game! Just before a nasty break-up most couples will engage in a never-ending blame – battle. Each party will be trying to justify their own behavior while painting the other one in the worst possible light.
This not only does little or nothing to make you feel better about the state of your relationship itself. Instead, avoiding the vicious circle of piling blames on each other will by itself significantly improve your relationship.
Always remember the saying that ‘it takes two to tangle‘. It is very unlikely for only one party to be solely responsible for any misunderstanding arising between the both of you.
You might feel like you are the aggrieved party. But claiming high moral ground and blaming your spouse blindly will definitely not help, but hurt the chances of saving your relationship.